Be With You | Seokjin

vingt sept : her

Jin's POV

"Kim Seok Jin? Principal wants to meet you." Red Hulk said and I went after him. I thought I could spend time with Hyerin after school but dad ruined it all.

As I arrived his room, he turned his chair to face me.

"What?" I asked him and he stifled a small laugh.

"You should know why I called you here." He said and I frowned.

"I heard that you're dating with your class president eh?" He questioned and I looked at him with my eyes widened.

"W-what? Where did that come from?" I asked him back and he sighed, smiling.

He threw the photos to the desk and I walked forward to get a closer look at them. Those were photos of Hyerin and me together. Why?

  "Well? Can you explain me this then?" He asked me and I placed the photos back on the desk.

I sighed. "Dad, is it wrong for your 18-year-old son to have a girlfriend?" I almost yelled but I managed to calm myself down.

He pressed his lips together. "I think that's not the point right now. My 12th rule in this school, if I remembered correctly, students are not allowed to do unnecessary stuffs like that in the school. It will damage this school's reputation." He stated the obvious and I rolled my eyes.

  "School, school school, reputation." You only care about those stuffs, don't you?" I said and he shrugged.

  "Well, you can say that. Don't ask me obvious questions. It's a waste of time."

"Dad, what the hell is wrong with you again?" I asked him, feeling irritated. He always got on my nerves.

"Student Choi Hyerin's dad just came to meet me this afternoon. Actually, I was told to investigate her but I couldn't believe that you would be the one." He told me and I just stood at the same place, looking at him.

  "He has already seen the photos." He added then my eyes became bigger. She's going to get into trouble because of me.

Everyone gets into trouble because of me.

  "I heard from him that Choi Hyerin got accepted by a medical school from USA but she refused so he kind of wanted to know the reason why. She was so desperate to study abroad before but now she changed her mind." He spoke more and I felt anger rising.

  "We all assume that the reason why she refused is because of," He stood up from his chair, hands resting on the desk. "You." He said directly to my face and I felt my heart dropped.

Come to think of it, she would do this kind of thing.

  "I suggest that it would be a good idea if you break up with her." He said calmly, sitting back down to his chair. His hands intertwined together and he placed them against his mouth, elbows resting on the desk.

  "So, what do you think? Do you want your girlfriend to give up on her dream just to stay with you?" He questioned and I stood there, dumbfounded.

I'm not going to let that happen.

I don't want to make people around me getting hurt because of my selfishness again. I definitely don't want that to happen. I should stop involving anyone to my life because they will just ended up getting hurt.

I'm an unlucky person.

I didn't reply my dad. Instead, I just walked outside his room and went directly to my classroom. She had already left. I felt so frustrated that I kicked the wall many times. I kept shouting until I felt satisfied.

My hands were shaking. I was so afraid to dial Hyerin. I opened Line and chatted to Haena instead. I was just asking where Hyerin was but she said she didn't know. I ended up telling her everything that happened and she was speechless.

She cheered me up; I felt nothing but sadness. I should decide this very carefully or else I'm going to ruin my love's future.

I can't destroy my loved ones' dreams again. I shouldn't involve others into my stupidity, not anymore.

But then I will have to let go of my one and only happiness.

My Line notification distracted my thinking.
해나 : ya ya, she's here.
me : okay thanks.

I went to the backyard feeling so hopeless that I couldn't even walk properly. I have to do this. You can do this, Kim Seok Jin.

I told Hyerin to meet me at the backyard. For a few minutes, she arrived and my throat tightened.

"Let's break up." I finally said it. I felt my heart broke into pieces and the urge of wanting to cry keeps increasing as I looked at her face with tears falling down on her cheeks.

I'm sorry, Hyerin.

"What did you just say, Jin?" She stuttered, wiping her tears away but they kept flowing down like waterfalls.

"Let's break up." I repeated then I couldn't bear to look at her face anymore. I walked away from her but I felt her hands hugging me from behind.

"Jin .. why? why are you doing this to me? what's wrong? did I do something wrong? I'm sorry .." She sobbed and I resisted the urge of crying. I tried to release her hands away but she hugged me tighter.

I bit my bottom lip so hard that I thought it might bleed. "Jin.. don't go" She cried and I wanted to cry as well but I can't. I released her hands from me and looked at her coldly.

"Ya, Choi Hyerin. Enough of this. I'm tired. You think I love you? I was just toying with you since the beginning." This is the biggest lie that I've ever told someone.

It pained me so much to do something that I don't want to do. But if it will help the people I loved, I have to sacrifice my own happiness.

I walked away immediately to my dorm and packed all of my stuffs back. I don't want to come into this school anymore. I can't face anyone, I can't just stay strong. This place gives me both good and bad memories but the bad ones are devouring me so hard.

I just left my only happiness. I'm sorry, Hyerin. I really love you.

Tears started to well up in my eyes and I tried to wipe them away. I collected my stuffs and walked outside the dorm. I looked at the gate and the security is nowhere to be seen so I just walked outside silently and took a taxi back home.

I entered my house and realized that my dad isn't there. I locked the gate and went upstairs to my bedroom. I don't know where my some of my furnitures are. I think dad moved them somewhere. I'm just glad that my bed is still there.

I threw my bags on the floor and sat down on my own bed. Now what? I have completely no idea what I should do anymore. I remembered all of the times I spent with her. My tears started to fall down forcefully and my heart ached. I gripped my shirt so tight and let myself lay down instead of sitting.

My tears can't stand being in my eyes anymore so they all came out in the speed of light. They soaked my pillow and mattress; I just hugged myself feeling scared to even do anything.

I don't want to leave her, I really love her. And yet . . .

Why did it have to be her?