Been You

16. Hey Bartender

"What a fucking asshole!" Alex exclaimed. I had just explained to her and Patrick what happened an hour ago. I had called them both to come over and cheer me up, because I needed it. I wasn't crying, though. I was just sort of...bummed? I really did like him. And he said he liked me too..so I'm just kind of confused, honestly, at the whole thing.

"Yeah. But it's whatever." I said, shoving another cookie in my mouth. All 3 of us were cuddles in our PJ's on my couch, covered in blankets, tons of junk food spread around us. 

"It just sucked because I had to act like everything was completely okay, and I thought the same, to avoid looking like annoying clingy fan girl, even though I felt like I was going to vomit." I said. "Literally earlier today I was telling you all about what had happened and it was so  good, and I was thinking about our future and how maybe, I don't know, we'd get married or something."

"Don't worry about him! He ain't shit, especially if he'd dump you." Patrick said, putting his hand on my shoulder. "So his reasoning was just that because of his last shitty relationships, and not being consistent with his girlfriends, they always ended bad and he doesn't want the same thing to happen with you?"

I nodded. "Yeah, pretty much. I mean, that's fine, I understand. I'm just upset because it was really random..like everything went from 100 to 0 real quick." I played with my fingers. "It was just really unexpected."

"Look at the Brightside though, he told you he still wanted to be like, 'best friends' though, right?" Alex asked, and I nodded. "See, he isn't out of your life completely. And like he said, maybe one day in the future you all could try and be together or something." she explained.

"Yeah, that's true." I groaned. "But FUCK, I actually thought I had a significant other and BOOM life said LOL NOPE." I threw my head back against the couch. "STUPID FUCKING HOT BOY WHO FINGERED ME THEN RUINED MY LIFE."

Alex and Patrick burst into laughter. "Well I'm glad to see you're handling things well." Patrick said through his chuckles.

"Whatever, cause you know what? I am a strong independent woman and I don't need a man to complete me!" I said.

"Exactly!" Alex said, as she clapped her hands.

"But I liked him!" I whined, throwing myself into her lap, and I felt her hand on my head, patting it, trying to comfort me. But Alex is awkward, and doesn't know how.

"Just..don't think about that. Think of something else. Like...fuckin'...I don't know...puppies?" Alex suggested, then I sprang up out of her lap, and gasped.

"BELLA COME TO MOMMY." I yelled. As soon as I did, I heard Bella's tiny footsteps running from my room to the living room. She sprinted, then jumped and landed on my lap. I squeezed her, then kissed her head. "Okay, so what now."

"Now?" Patrick said, then held up the plate of cookies. "We eat."

____________________________________________________

So it had been a week and a half since Justin and I last spoke. Yeah, I miss him sometimes. Okay, all  the time. But I'm fine. And he's right. I need someone who is consistent. And always there. Maybe we're just meant to be friends anyway.

Patrick had suggested I go on a date with someone, but I told him no. I wasn't really ever in the mood. I just wanted to focus on work, and myself for a while.

I had seen pictures online of Justin, he had left LA and went to Chicago, and Atlanta, doing promo and interviews and stuff. He looked good...happy. I had expected some sort of text or phone call after he ended things. Guess not. Which was one of my fears. That after that things would get awkward and we'd never speak again.