Assassin's Creed Oneshots

Innuendos {Desmond Oneshot}

Desmond's brow furrowed as he and Shaun stopped short of the doorway, listening into the muffled conversation from the other side of the door before them. The voices of both Adele and Monica jesting with one another resounding out to the two men as they did so.

"Fuck your knife! Fuck it hard!" Adele's voice shouted, though amusement was clearly in the tone of her voice, no matter how loudly she was shouting.

"Fine!" Monica's voice replied, just as loudly. "I will! I'll fuck it all night!"

"Good!"

"WHY DO YOU TWO TALK?!" Silver's voice shouted out, embarrassed, and it wouldn't be a surprise to either Desmond or Shaun if her face was bright red at this. She was the shiest out of the trio of women they had met recently.

"Do I.... really want to know....?" Desmond grumbled, jerking his thumb at the still closed door and glancing at Shaun. Shaun merely shrugged.

"Something tells me-"

What that something was telling Shaun he didn't get a chance to inform Desmond as Monica shouted out; "Stop pulling it!"

"I'm sorry!" Silver's voice answered.

"Don't pull it, okay? You'll just make it tighter!"

"Ooooh~ Kinky~," Adele's voice purred.

"Only the first time~," Monica laughed.

"I'm... I'm just going to erase this conversation from my mind, okay?" Silver sighed.

"That's it," and with that Shaun pulled the door open quickly, three pairs of dark brown eyes blinking up at him owlishly in curiosity. Between the three of them was a tangle of wire knotted up rather badly. Clearly these were the wires to the Animus and laptops that Rebecca had left them in charge of untangling for her as she set everything up in the other room. Why it took three people on one knot, no one could say for sure.

"Hi!" Monica grinned after several seconds of silence, straightening up as she spotted Desmond and tucking a stray piece of dark hair behind her ear. It had become obvious to both Adele and Silver that the wild woman was rather enamored with Desmond, and they made every attempt in their spare time when he wasn't around (and sometimes when he was) to mock the woman for it.

"I'm not even going to ask..." Desmond decided after another round of silence, passing Shaun to enter the room and approaching the girls on his way to the other side of the room.

"Wait!" Desmond halted, foot in midair as he blinked curiously at Adele, who was now smirking widely as she turned to Monica, her long platinum blond hair swaying as she did so. "Monica! Tell him what I taught you yesterday!"

Confusion littered Monica's face for but a moment before it was alight in excitement again, though Silver's face was still just as confused. "Suck it! Don't bite it or chew it!"

Grins lined Monica and Adele's faces as Desmond's mouth opened and closed briefly, the two women watching him intently for his reaction. At the doorway Shaun pinched the bridge of his nose in disbelief, counting under his breath to steady his irritation at the women he was stuck with in this particular safe house. Who would have known two of the three were raging perverts?

"I'm not even going to comment on that. There's no safe way to." And with that deduction a red-faced Desmond was off.

"See? It works like a charm~!" Adele instructed.

"Hahahahahaha!"

"You're both very lonely aren't you?" Shaun pitched in finally.

"Only a little~. But I'm sure Silver won't be so lonely if she was huggled up to a strong man like yourself~" Monica retaliated.

"Oh my gosh! Why do you SPEAK?!"