Take That Are The Inspiration

How Deep Is Your Love?

Song: How Deep Is Your Love?
Year: 1996
Album: Greatest Hits/ Never Forget: The Ultimate Collection
Pairing: Doctor/Master

....

"I love you, I always have. When we were kids and even now. I was too afraid to admit it before, I was always in denial." I say, I cannot believe I just admitted my feelings to this man. This man has always tried to make my life a living hell, but I still love him.

"How deep is your love for me, Doctor, though? How deep does it go? Or is this a petty excuse for getting out of death?" The Master –Koschei – spits in my face.

"You know, how I feel. You always have. I know you always have." I'm pleading with my life that he will understand.

"Really?"

"Yes,"

Koschei's eyes go soft and he looks at me like he did the very first day we met back on Gallifrey all those years ago. In his eyes we're children again, laughing in the sun and having fun. Neither of us had a care in the world at that point. All that mattered was each other and that's how we wanted it to stay, but of course, it never did.

As I gaze into his eyes I lose myself as I often used to back in the good old days. They may have changed colour so many times since that day, but underneath it all, they are still the same beautiful eyes that I remember seeing when I was a child.

Koschei looks away and I find myself being brought back to the present. I can't work out if he's still going to try and kill me or not. I love him too much that whatever he does I will somehow forgive him. It happens every time.

"I know you're lying, so why don't you just let me get this over and done with." I close my eyes and try and stop the tears from falling. I've tried so hard and he still doesn't understand. This was never meant to be apparently. I finally thought that maybe everything will be all right between us and we could put this all in the past. But now, that seems to be just a distant wish that will never come true.

I brace myself for what I know is about to come. I've given up, nothing matters to me anymore. I might as well die. Everything I have ever loved has gone and this is just another one of those moments. Whenever I think I'm going to be happy, something always happens and turns my life back upside down. I'm sick of it now, the constant suffering, and the constant being alone. I really wanted to believe that today would mark the end of it all, but no, once again the universe has decided to hate me. After all that I have done, the universe can't let me have my share of happiness. How is that fair?

Just when I'm ready for the blow that will end my life permanently, I feel two hands cup my face and I open my eyes to see Koschei looking at me. His eyes softer than before and he looks like he wants to say something important. My eyes look into his eyes with confusion.

"Theta, you're... you're right."

"Wha...?"

"I know you mean it."

"Mean what?" And as soon as those words are out I know exactly what he means. "Oh," I say in realisation. Koschei doesn't say anything in return but instead I feel his lips upon mine. And in that moment I know how deep his love for me is.