S 1 E 7 : "S I N N E R S W I T H H A L O S "
PREVIOUSLY, ON REAL HUSBANDS OF SEOUL
jungkook: [ creeps into house, silently shuts the front door; tip toes into living room quietly ]
[ [ floorboard creaks ] ]
jungkook: [ silently scolds camera crew for making noise ] !!!!!????!!!
[ [ jungkook tip toes into the living room quietly; startled when the living room lamp goes on ] ]
??: hello...
[ [ camera pans to nayoung, menacingly waiting in a black leather armchair with folded hands ]
nayoung: jeon jungkook.
jungkook: bae look before you get mad i can explai--
2 W E E K S L A T E R
-JUNGKOOK-
[ [ with bandana around head and charcoal stripes on cheeks ] ]
"so it's been like,
[ checks the tally he made on the wall ]
it's been about fourteen days and i've been living in the guest house in our backyard.... aaaaand it fucking sucks.
nayoung is still pretty mad at me and won't let me into the house, but it could be worse. i'm just glad she hasn't ripped my nuts off yet.
i mean at first, living here was pretty bad. i've been living off of chef boyardee's and gatorades, because that's all that's stocked in the fridge. there's no air conditioning and i can literally feel myself breathing in my own sweat because it's just that humid. today i put on the last clean pair of underwear that i packed. there was even this one monster with big eyes and a hairy body, it was like twenty feet tall with six legs and the most ferocious look in its eyes. it used to stare at me at night when i was trying to sleep."
--
jungkook: [ screeching, balled up in corner of wall ]
[ [ camera pans to the monster in the middle of the room ] ]
cameraman: ...... jungkook that's a roach
--
"but now i realize that aubrey is actually quite friendly. i can't understand what she's saying because she speaks roach, but she's generally a good roommate. i think we have some great synergy and make a great pair."
