Dealing with some stuff (Minishaw)

Ch. 1 - Youtube can be hard

Harry was starting to really hate his life, He did not feel normal anymore, he had a love/hate relationship with this youtube fame he had going on. There was so much hate on this site, he often thought off banning the comments on all his videos so he would not have to deal with it. He even considered deleting his twitter and youtube sometimes, but what would he do then? He had dropped out off school to do this and he felt like there was no going back. What would he do if he closed it down, he had no plan B

"Harry we are going to get some Nandos? Are you with?" Simon shouted as he barged trough the door into his room were Harry was sitting on his bed just playing some game on his phone.

"who's going?"

"everyone, get your butt up if you wanna go"

"nahh, I really don't feel like it,"

"are you OK, you seem down?" Simon asked, now in a lower set off tone

"I think I'm getting sick, I'll be fine" Harry lied, this was a commonly used lie to get out off something when he was feeling down, He thought he had to come up with a new lie soon as before they would start to question this one. 

"I'll bring you back a chicken wrap then, OK?"

"yeah thanks" Harry said and smiled. He heard as Simon ran to the front door and told the others that Harry would not be joining them this time and he told them the reason that Harry had given him

"he has been sick a lot this past year" Ethan said confused and with that they left the house.

"They don't care, they never cared about me, I was the last one into the Sidemen, I can also be the first one out" Harry thought to himself.

 He walked to his dresser were he kept his secret. He picked up a small wooden box that he hid carefully under all his boxers, there was no chance the others would look there. He picked up the box and walked into the bathroom. He sat down in the shower and turned it on, then he took out a razorblade and sliced a deep cut over his arm, he felt the pain and the pleasure running through him as the blood dripped down into the bottom off the shower and he watched it go down his arms with a smile. This was not the first time and it would not be the last time he did this