Man Overboard

13. I'm a Little Bit Shy, a Bit Strange and a Little Bit Manic

(A/N: My search history looks so weird after writing this chapter...)

I couldn't focus on anything. Every time I closed my eyes, I just saw the positive results on my tests. It kept me up at night, thinking about what the hell I was going to do. I couldn't do anything at this point, not without my dad's knowledge anyway. If I went to an abortion clinic, my dad would be notified since I was still a minor. All I could do was wait.

I couldn't sleep, and not just because of my constant worrying. It was because of my bed. Whenever I lied in it, the memory of my father on top of me played in my head. The same act that had gotten me into this predicament just kept making the situation worse.

In classes I would start to fall asleep on accident, unable to keep my eyes open. The napping only led to detention, making me even more stressed.

"Didn't school get out an hour ago?" Tom asked the following Wednesday.

"Yeah," I sighed. I tossed my backpack onto the floor and collapsed onto the couch exhaustedly.

"Did you go home first?" Tom sat down next to me. I winced at just the thought of home. It was so difficult to keep my secret from my father. It always felt like he could tell when I was lying, but so far he hadn't caught on. He hadn't treated me any worse than usual at least, only getting rough a couple of nights when he had too much to drink.

"No, I had detention," I answered.

"Why did you have detention?" Tom raised an eyebrow.

"I fell asleep in English class," I muttered.

"Mark would be so disappointed," Tom teased, making me smile weakly.

"I couldn't help it. It wasn't the class," I explained. "I'm just so tired all the time. I can't sleep at night."

Tom placed his arm over my shoulders and I leaned into his embrace. "It'll all be over soon," he comforted, correctly inferring the reason for my lack of sleep.

I nodded, hoping he was right. But I was still terrified. What if my dad somehow found out? What if the abortion went wrong? What would I do after the abortion, just pretend it never happened?

"So I was doing some research," Tom started, mindlessly dragging his fingers across my shoulder. "And I think you should get an ultrasound this weekend. It might be that you're not even pregnant, and you're required to get one before having an abortion anyways. Maybe it'll relieve some of your stress."

"But clinics have to notify a parent if a minor is seeking an abortion," I countered.

"Yeah, but you can still get an ultrasound as a minor," Tom said. "You can go to an ob-gyn."

"And they won't tell my dad?" I asked, turning to look up at him.

Tom shook his head. "Not unless he calls and asks for information about your appointment. But he won't even know you went."

I looked at the blank TV in front of us, pondering Tom's suggestion.

"I can go with you if you want," Tom offered. "If it'd make you feel better."

"Really?" I glanced at him with surprise and gratitude.

"Of course," Tom smiled gently.

"Thank you," I said softly. I rested my head against his chest, my eyes fluttering shut. I slept peacefully for the first time all week.