Lost

part 6

"Breathe Bella," Jasper whispered. "I'm going to remove my hand, okay?"

Bella nodded and Jasper pulled his hand away from her mouth. "Why are you here Jasper?"

"Alice saw you deciding to call Rosalie and then changing your mind. After her vision changed a dozen times she decided to make the decision for you, so she sent me here," Jasper explained.

He moved away from Bella to give her some space. He sat in her rocker while she climbed onto her bed. "Where's Rosalie?" she mumbled rocking back and forth.

"She's hunting," Jasper told her. "She will be back in a couple hours. Until then you're stuck with me," he joked. "Bella, I can feel your emotions and you need to calm down before you have a panic attack."

He got up and slowly walked over to Bella. "Breathe Bella," he muttered. He gently placed his hand on her shoulder and sent her small amounts of calm, love and reassurance.

It took Jasper twenty minutes to help calm Bella down. He didn't want to over manipulate her emotions. He wanted it to be more natural so she could, hopefully, be able to calm herself at some point. After everything Bella had been through he didn't want to take away her control of her emotions.

"Thank you," Bella said, leaning against Jasper. It wasn't the cool body she wanted but she felt safe and content."

"Anytime Bella," he promised. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"There were so many people, so many guys," Bella told him. "I couldn't handle it. I wanted Rosalie. I needed Rosalie but she couldn't be there. I went to the beach and one of the wolves, Paul Lahote, found me. He told me an interesting story."

"Did he?" Jasper questioned.

Bella nodded. "He said you saved a Quileute boy," Bella told him.

"I did," Jasper confirmed.

"You're too hard on yourself," Bella said.

Jasper pulled away from Bella and frowned. "What makes you say that?" he asked curious.

"I... you seem so careful and afraid of hurting people," Bella explained. "But you saved a young boy. You're a good guy Jasper. I wish you saw that."

Jasper smiled slightly at her. "Thanks Bella," he said gratefully. "I doubt you will say that after you hear my story. Do you still want to hear it?"

"Yes," she nodded.

"I was born Jasper Whitlock in 1844 in Houston, Texas," Jasper began. "I joined the Confederate Army just before my seventeenth birthday and ended up being the youngest Major. I was on my way back to Galveston when I met them: Maria, Lucy and Nettie. I thought they needed help so I offered my services. But they didn't. Maria sensed something in me. She changed me because the other two couldn't without killing me."

"Did you love her?" Bella interrupted. She blushed in embarrassment. "Sorry I didn't mean to interrupt."

"It's okay," Jasper said patting her hand. "And no, I didn't love her. I was infatuated with her, a lot like you with Edward, but that was it. She played on my emotions to make me loyal to her. I became the deadliest soldier in the vampire world. They called me the God of War. Everyone I went up against I beat. I killed thousands of men, women and children."

Bella hugged him. "It's not your fault," she told him. "She manipulated you. She made you into someone you're not. That's her fault, not yours."

Jasper smiled. "Thank you Bella," he said. "Alice told me the same thing when I told her everything." They were silent for a minute. "How are you feeling?"