Louis' Depressed Girl

Chapter Twenty: Your still with me

A/N: Pleaser read the authors note at the end if you are capable of making an amazing cover for this story. xx

Louis' P.O.V

I stood up with shaky hands and warm, salty tears pouring from my eyes.

"God dammit Mia! You're not gone!" I cry, "You're not gone..." I stood up and jerked open the door and ran out, unsure of where I was going.

"Louis!" I hear one of the boys call behind me, yet I refuse to answer them.

I made it out into the streets where ambulances and police cars lined up, crowds of people forming.

"Is that Louis Tomlinson?" Some of them whisper as I push by them.

I walked up to my car and slammed the door shut. And thats when I lost it.

"AHHHHHHHHH!" I scream in anger, slamming my fists against the wheel. "Dammit, dammit, dammit!" I curse, starting the vehicle up quickly.

I wasn't sure of where I was going, and I couldn't give more of a shit about it, all I wanted was out.

All I saw were lights flashing quickly past me, the world caving in, just like my heart.

I didn't even notice when the lights stopped passing by, or the road ahead was strangely dark... All I knew was that I was tired of breaking. My life was a mess, and I'm scared to say that it might just stay that way, and I didn't care.

If I had only paid attention to her more, stopped focusing on making her happy , but start focusing on making her better again. I was oblivious to the fact that she had a mental illness that couldn't just be cured with a romantic snuggle and a cute disney movie. I should've talked to her, beg her for answers, comfort her when she needed me. Yet I was a selfish jerk who was to lovestruck to notice that she wasn't truly happy, actually, she was far from happiness. I could tell. She was so torn up, like she was being buried alive, and no one could hear her pleads... I thought I did, but I was clearly mistaken.

I couldn't help but feel like the complete dick here. I put her where she's at now. I started all the drama in her life. If I didn't drink that night, if I had just stayed with her the whole time... She would probably be with me now, curled up in my arms, snoring slightly with the soft murmurs coming from the TV.

Now I'm just being selfish. Blaming myself, when really I should be by Mia's side, telling her to stay strong, and not to let go. I felt the need to be by her now, stroke her soft, black hair, and sing to her softly,hoping to see her bright, blue eyes sparkle once again, and for that hidden smile reappear back on her face.

Yet instead, I am stuck out in the middle of nowhere, unsure if I should return back to town, or just stay here and beat myself up about this whole thing, the fact that Mia is possibly gone, and I was the one to blame.

I got a burst of motivation and pulled out my cell phone, scrolling down to Mia's name in my contacts list, hitting the call button quickly. After a few rings, a female voice chimes in.

"Hi, you have reached Mia's voicemail, I'm spry if I couldn't answer your call but-"

"But she's to busy spending time with her gorgeous boyfriend," I hear myself chuckle.

"Lou, give it back," I heard Mia laugh in the distance, "Anyways, please leave a message, byeeeee!!"

And with that I hung up, my heart racing just by the sound of her sweet, musical voice through the speaker of my cell phone.

Now I finally realize that I am not hallucinating, that she really is gone. That today was the last day I had with her, yet I used it by breaking every piece of her heart, and yelling at her in such a selfish, and rude way. And I was the only one to blame. Not Liam, Zayn, Niall, her friends, Harry, or even her ex. It was all me, yet it took me all of this time to realize that, and now I couldn't even say goodbye, because it's to late.

I pulled my car into reverse and began to drive back to town, not really sure where I might be going, and I know for a fact it won't be the hospital, nor the apartment. I knew if Mia was alive now she wouldn't want to see me, not after what I did to her.

So instead I pulled up to my hotel and just sat there in my car completely motionless. I had lost all my motivation to move, speak, or even blink. I just sat there in the complete silence of my vehicle with my eyes shut, and my head resting on the back of my seat.

If it wasn't for the ringing of my phone, then I might have fallen asleep.

I reached into my pocket, fishing for my phone. Once I found it, I glanced at the caller ID. "Hello?" I spoke, my voice raspy and dry.

"Hey, you alright Lou?" I heard Harry ask in the other line.

"I'm fine, I guess." I shrug, even though  he was unable to see it. "Is everything alright?"

"Well, where are you?" I heard him breathe in slightly.

"Sitting outside of the hotel, unable to do much," I sigh, my lips forming into an unpleasing frown.

"Do you think you could come to the hospital? Now?" He asked, but it almost sounded like a demand, I could tell by the stern tone in his voice.

"Why?" I questioned.

"Louis, she's awake. And she's asking for you."

A/N: First off I want to say that I'm sorry if this chapter is extremely short, but understand that I put much detail into this and I suddenly had a huge spark of motivation at the moment, and this was all I could manage to write. I would have done more but I wanted to end it there. I am also on my computer, so I'm not really sure how long this will be.

But, I just want to say a huge thank you to every single one of you. You all don't understand how much very vote, comment, or fan means to me, seriously. I log onto my computer sometimes to see how much my story has progressed comment and votes wise, and every time I see one I mentally thank you and smile. Without you all I wouldn't even have the motivation to do ANYTHING this summer, but with you guys always itching for the next chapter, I'm always happy to write. If any of you were curious, the book is not coming to an end just yet. I plan on at least hitting 30 chapters before I end it. So don't be worried, haha. 

And finally I really want to have another contest, but I'm afraid there won't be another for this story. I have all the characters I need. Unless, any of you have talent in drawing/ painting, or possibly computer skills. I've been looking for someone to make a beautiful cover for this story, because mine is extremely dull.  So contact me ASAP if you have the ability to do so! :) Well I should probably stop talking. So be sure to VOTE, COMMENT, FAN, AND SHARE!!! Remember that when you do you get a mental thank you from me haha. Love you all so much, and thanks fot the support. xoxo ~Autumn