I just realized.. Both of my friends that have helped me through so much and kept me alive for the past years I don't even speak to anymore.
One was always there for me since 1st grade and when I moved we kinda drifted our separate ways she's literally the main reason I'm alive..
Then my other friend... He's helped me out since 7th grade. He's talked me out of doing something countless times.. But he doesn't support me being agender.. So we kinda just bitched at each other and stopped speaking.. An now I'm fucking terrified because he knows so much about me.. He knows more about me than my female friend.. He only doesn't know one thing the other does. He could literally make life even worse if he truly wanted to..
Then again the thing the girl knows but the guy doesn't know my family doesn't even know because they weren't home when it happened and she promised to tell no one..
