<< still before >>
<Dans POV>
My mind wouldn't stop spinning. I was perfectly still; I had been for god knows how long. My eyes hurt so much every time I blinked I felt my eyes were being stabbed. My muscles ached, I didn't want to move, but I knew I had to.
I gripped my hands on the bed sheets and pushed myself up. Shower. I needed to go in the shower, my clothes were damp and I felt so cold. Not physically cold, I don't think, more of a numbing cold. I adjusted my feet to the ground and slowly stood up, my feet trembling instantly. I paced my way over to the mirror, keeping my head to the ground as I walked, to ashamed to be within the walls of my own apartmen-- of our apartment.
I hesitantly raised my head to look at my reflection in the mirror. It didn't look like me, it looked like someone completely different.
Large bags under my eyes, not off staying on the internet all night with Phil.
Red puffy cheeks, not off blushing whenever Phil smiled or laughed or touched me.
Bloodshot eyes, not off staring at Phil so much my mind forgot the ability to blink.
Lips almost bleeding, not from when I nervously bite them whenever Phil gazes at me with his ice like eyes.
Running nose, not from when Phil tries to get me to order spicy food at 2 in the morning.
... My hobit hair, not from when I wake up in the morning and Phil gets lost in my tangled brown curled locks almost immediately asking me to keep them "just for one day, Dan" ... "Please, Dan" he'd say.
Every single little thing reminded me of him. What had I done, I'm so stupid...
I turned on the shower, taking off my clothes, the exact clothes from that night. It must have been at least 2 days.
Warm bursts of water rolled down my body, almost soothing the numb pain throughout it, not like Phil could though. One touch, one hug off him would've soothed any pain I was feeling.
My face stung as the water pierced it, draining the tear stains from my face and levelling out the redness. Steam filled the whole shower, clouding my vision. My legs shook wildly, until they gave in. I just lay there in the shower, not even attempting to get up.
I'm so weak.
I'm so pathetic.
My eyes drifted shut despite my attempts to open them. The water gushed down onto my stomach, my back lay against the cold shower tiles.
My lips parted slightly, trembling, "Phil" I managed a slow painful whimper clouded by the mist, muffled by the soothing sound of the shower hitting my skin.
My mind went black, for what felt like hours. Just plain black...
My vision slowly found its way back, I raised my hands in attempt to rub my eyes back into focus when a hand placed itself onto mine, lowering it with care.
"It's ok" I heard a calm relieving voice, whilst a hand placed itself on my face slowly rubbing my eyes for me.
I still seemed to be in the shower, sitting against the wall. The water had stopped and was lightly dripping off onto the tiles as the steam still whirled it's way around.
"P-Phil?" I mumbled, as my eyes focuses on my surroundings more.
"Yes?" He replied In a quiet sweet tone.
"I- uh- you- what?" My mumbling gets cut off by the soft sound of Phil giggling at my attempts of speech. He places his hand upon mine and looks me straight in the eyes, not even acknowledging the rest of my naked body.
He smiled lightly before speaking once more "hey, look who's got hobit hair" he giggles to himself before running his fingers through my wet curly locks, whilst placing his other hand on my shoulder.
I cocked my head at him as he messed with my hair playfully, a large smile appeared upon his face, causing me to smile even more; almost giggling myself. He lowered his hand and placed it on my other shoulder before looking down at me.
A small laugh escaped his lips before he leaned in and connected ours. Butterflies emerged in my stomach as he moved his hands from my shoulders to around my neck. I never liked people touching my neck but this was different, his soft touch felt so welcoming and soothing. Everything faded out apart from his soft pale lips onto mine and his soothing arms around my neck calmly but quickly pulling me in further, his hands softly gripping the back of it, lightly digging his nails in. It felt so good. I wanted it to last forever.
But nothing lasts forever.
Steam still swirled around us, steam still stuck to the glass shower door, all apart from one area, right beside Phil. Written in the steam on the glass door was the painful words engraved in my head, "fine, I'll leave".
Everything went black again, only the faint sound of Phil's soft giggling remained.
I'm sorry for not posting in ages :/
YOU ARE READING
Fine, I'll leave (Phanfiction)
Fanfiction"GET OUT" Arguments happen and Phil is told to leave the apartment. Who's knows if it's the last time Dan will talk to him... "Fine, I'll leave" Phil is missing, it's been 2 weeks and Dan blames himself entirely. ** This is supposed to be a emotion...
