Guard My Heart

Chapter Eight

They snooze for a bit, the sated sensation of loving dragging them toward oblivion as Regina and Robin lie together. Despite her sleepy brain and heavy limbs it isn't long before that damned voice that is constantly whispering to her this is too good, it won't work, starts to creep through Regina's mind. How badly will this affect their relationship?

"What are we going to do?" Her voice is quiet, barely above a whisper, disturbing the tranquil air around them as she swirls the tips of her fingers in random patterns over his chest and her head rests on his shoulder, Robin's arms holding her tightly to him. "About us? About this?" Ending up in bed together had not been part of the plan and in fact will likely complicate matters tenfold. Just what they had needed in this situation. But resisting each other had become impossible and now they have to deal with the consequences of their actions.

Robin's hand slides up and down Regina's naked back. He doesn't have a good answer for her, is just as taken aback by the depth of his feelings for this woman as she is. Never would he have imagined he would fall so hard for her when he had accepted this job. He may have no clue what comes next but if Robin is certain of one thing it's that he wants Regina in his life, in every way possible. And he will not regret being with her this way, prays to whomever is listening that Regina won't either.

"This can't happen again, Robin. We both know that. It doesn't change anything." Robin's arms tighten around her in protest, as if he's afraid she'll disappear if he doesn't hold onto her. Wishing she didn't have to drag them back to reality Regina continues, "You are my bodyguard and anything between us would never work." Regina pauses, sitting up and extricating herself from his embrace, holding the sheet to her breasts as a protective shield and steels herself for what she's about to say next, "This was a mistake."

The words are like a dagger to his heart.

Saying it kills her but Regina knows no other way to fix the damage they've done. She can't be in a relationship, isn't destined for romantic happiness, has known it since the day Daniel died and she will not drag Robin down with her. Despite his adamant attempts to convince her that this thing between them could actually work she is positive it never would. It's impossible. He deserves so much more than she can give him and Regina cares far too much about him to give Robin anything less than everything.

Denial is her only option, no matter how strongly she wants to bury herself within his embrace and distract them both from the mess they've gotten themselves into. Her heart can't take the uncertainty. They should never have slept together. Now it's going to take all of Regina's strength to make it through this conversation, to force Robin out of her bed when all she wants is to forget the outside world exists and her greatest desire at the moment is to stay cocooned in their little bubble and toss her leg over his hips to straddling him, wants to experience that glorious peak with him again. Why does this have to be so damn complicated?

It shouldn't surprise him that she's trying to run again, to erect that wall between them, but Robin had thought they were past this. Perhaps they should have stopped to talk before they'd wildly taken each other after all. "You don't mean that."

Because she can't, not truly. In the time that he's known her Robin has learned how to read this woman, her fears, her insecurities, and he knows exactly what she's doing, what she's been doing for weeks now. He just doesn't know why. Every time they take a step forward or he sees just a bit more of the woman she hides beneath her tough image she throws up another wall to keep them apart. Why should this time be any different? Except it is. Because now Robin knows what it feels like to hold her in his arms, to kiss her, to make her moan his name in ecstasy, and there is no way he can be expected to give that up simply because she's scared of what they have. He refuses to.