What is Hope?

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A/N: Hello all! So I have decided that between school and my job, I will only be able to update maybe once a week. This chapter coincides with the episode "Twilight's Last Gleaming". I hope you all love this chapter! I know things haven't been escalating quickly. 

I am really trying to stay true to the script and what actually happens in the show. I don't really like when OCs do things  that the original characters actually do, so I am trying to steer clear of that. 

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I slowly open my eyes. I find myself engulfed in pillows and blankets. I rub my eyes and slowly sit up. I reach up and stretch my arms, attempting to wake myself up faster. I grab a fistful of blankets and bring them to my face. I take in a familiar scent. Realizing where I am, I bolt up trying to figure out why I am here.

"Well it's about time you got up." Bellamy's soft voice rings in my ears. I look up at him wide eyed.

"What happened? Why am I here?" I ask. I quickly glance down to make sure I still have my clothes on.

"You don't remember your freak out yesterday?" He chuckles to himself. Everything starts to come back to me in flashes. Here, the ground, Wells, Charlotte, everything. I place my head in my hands.

"What did I do? I don't remember anything after Ch-Charlotte jumped." I try to swallow my pain.

Bellamy looks at me hesitantly. "You wouldn't talk to anyone. You just sat there. I had to carry you back here. I wasn't sure where you stayed, so I figured I would let you stay with me." He gets up from the stool he was sitting on and walks over to me. 

We sit there in silence for a little bit. I steal glances at Bellamy every once and awhile. 

"I've never seen you like that before. I had no idea what to do." Bellamy mumbles, his eyes still focused on the ground. 

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have broken down like that." I sigh. "If only you knew everything I am going through" I laugh to myself. He really doesn't know the half of it. I feel a warmth on my chin. Bellamy tilts my head up so I am looking at him.

"You can tell me what you're going through. I'm here for you." He whispers. I feel his warm breath on my face. A shiver goes down my spine. I look into his eyes. Everything starts to come back to me. What we had together. Me finding out I am pregnant. Bellamy leaving me before I could tell him. This awful place. How Bellamy hasn't giving me a second thought since we have been down here. All of the girls he has slept with. I didn't realize how hurt I am by everything that Bellamy has done to me. What if this is all an act? What if he just wants to sleep with me and leave me again? What we had was real, but I don't know how he feels about us anymore. With my anger boiling inside me I whack his hand away from me. 

"Bellamy what the hell? You can't just leave me, ignore me, sleep with anyone you like, and then expect me to fall back in your arms like nothing happened! I was alone for the worst news of my life! I haven't even been able to enjoy the fact-the fact that I'm..." I cut myself off. I shouldn't tell him. He doesn't deserve the satisfaction. "Never mind. The point is you hurt me Bell. I refuse to be another girl on your list. I really thought you were different." Tears start to well up in my eyes. I look at him, he has a blank expression on his face. "We were something more, something real. That was all ruined. I thought that if I came down here with you we could start over, but man was I completely wrong. This was all just one big mistake." I look down where a ring of metal was on my left hand. I twist it off. "I love you Bellamy. I always have and always will. I just don't think you love me. I can't do this chasing after you thing anymore." I set the scrap of metal on the bed. "I've got to go." I quickly walk off, tears still brimming my eyes.

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