Last Chances

Sorry

I wake up at 8am sharp and see that Holly is on the couch with Ventura in the cot next to her. I sit on the couch next to her. 

"I really would like to apologise for the way I have reacted this whole time it has been so wrong of me to behave the way I have done for the past week or so.  I need to step up now and be a proper dad to Ventura not someone that stays in bed till the afternoon every day avoiding everyone and everything, not eating, drinking and avoiding daily things like even going to the shops. I know Emily would not be at all impressed and for that reason alone I need to change. I understand that I have to also improve my attitude towards people as I know they are only here to help me and I need to stop pushing people away from me especially those closest to me like you, Billy and my parents."

"I am so happy you have realised this but it is okay to feel down sometimes. The pain doesn't just go away over night." Holly reassures me. 

"I just feel so heartbroken and lost without her." I admit. 

"I understand, I don't have a companion to go shopping with me or go get our nails done together or go to the spa together or anything like that." 

**

I take Ventura on a little stroll round town to the local supermarket with me in his pram to get some shopping in for the household. What would only have been a 30 minute outing usually took me 2 hours today. People were coming up to me in the shops sending their condolences to me which was very much appreciated. They were all commenting on how adorable Ventura looked under his little blue knitted blanket and how he is another way to remember Emily. 

**

I was going through Emily's drawers in her desk and came across a letter it reads; 

Dear Peter

I know this might not be easy for you but you will be an amazing dad to our child no matter the sex. You can take them to the park or to football games if its a boy or you can have little tea parties and have dress up days as fairy princesses if its a girl. You will be an amazing parent regardless that is one thing I am sure off for certain. I will love you forever and always Peter, Always remember that. 

I love you x 

Love Emily 

The End