Hope Beacons (NaNoWrioMo 2015)

Chapter 22

Do you ever wake up one day and nothing makes sense? Well right now I kind of feel like that. I mean how was this okay? How did depression not exist and when did they start banning books? I mean she had to figure out what to do because she knew Senka was out there. I couldn't just wait here and just die or something!

I wanted to live and I wasn't going to let this whatever it was to stop me. I got up and got dress sense it was new day and wondered what I was going to do. I mean should confront this person?!?! Or whatever it was but I had no idea. But I had to find answers. With or Without help. I got my phone that was charging and called Sam. It was Saturday we had day off and I forgot it was kind of early because Sam was tired when he answers his phone. I might of woke him up.

"Hello" he said in morning voice. He wasn't awake yet and well I didn't blame it was 7 am in morning on Saturday. Of course I knew I should be sleeping because well the old me would sleep till 10 am. But now here was. I couldn't sleep anymore. I had to figure this out now.

"Come over here please, after you wake up I need your help" I whispered. I didn't know why I should do that but I did. I hung up and gave him time. I decided to go down stairs to get something to eat hoping to wake up.

I got a bowl of cereal and poured milk in it and ate it. I went to living room and watched his pointless show about food. Something about something honestly I wasn't paying attention I just need something to do. I put my cereal bowl that was empty in the sink after I was done with spoon and turn the TV after I went to the door because there was a knock.

There he was in Sweatshirt sense it was kind of cold and rainy this morning. He had his hood up and hold a cup of coffee. He was in his favorite skinny jeans and black boots. He put his hood down when he walked in and shook his head getting me wet. cause of his hair.

"OI" I said not that loud but you got to the point. We headed to my room and sat down on bed while he took sip of his coffee and looked why did you bring me here.

"I found people online that are going through like me, they too never heard of depression and one of them is dead." I mumbled last part and Sam took big sip of coffee but end up coughing putting cup down on bedside table started at me with wide eyes.

"You're Not going to die are you" he asked worried and pulled me into a hug which I was kind of use too. I almost hugged him back.

"I mean I get those thoughts but I didn't do anything but I'm scared I will... lately I been scared of a lot of things and I just can't do this anymore... I can't be like this...if I do I'm afraid something bad will happen" I whispered and looked down. I could feel him staring at me. I didn't look up to see it was because he was worried about me. He is always worry about me anyways. I think he honestly told my brother he would promise to look out for me. I know I can look out for myself but it's nice to have a friend to go too.

"Well I'm not going to let that happen, I'm here right here and we will figure this out okay" he poked him and nodded and sighed as I leaned back against the wall that my bed was next too. Sam did the same his curly hair was bouncing when he moved. That was random and I didn't get why I was staring at me. Shaking my head, I bit my lip and looked down again.

"Well we need a plan what to do next let's go all the facts" Sam said trying to help me. I nodded and got my laptop and open a new document.

"Well. let's start with the light" I mumbled and wrote that down first and we started to talk about what happen. We got down a list and this is what it looked like.

-Loss of light

-feel well worse than terrible

-Senka