Hope Beacons (NaNoWrioMo 2015)

Chapter 23

I Remember hearing a quote from someone. I don't remember who or where but I know I was young.

"We are told when we are young that monster is not real. But as we get older we see that they are. They are not fairy tales sometimes they are real people or in our head. But we can do something within us. Something so strong that will fight monsters. That voice that says not to give up and not to give in. That voice is stronger...and we will realize that we are strong too"

And I didn't know what it meant. At least till now. I guess when you think most of the life that it will be easy. That it will be okay always. When this is life.

I know there's good and bad. Even through all my life we were told that there wasn't. I didn't know if I was going to win. Or whatever I was doing. But I just... I couldn't let it control my life

I just couldn't...unless I was done but I just. I don't know.

I didn't know what to do and right now I know of thought I was crazy. I knew people probably I was already there. But here I was right now at this moment alive...and I knew if I wanted to be alive truly alive I would have to confront it

But I didn't let anyone know what I was going to do. I fact I played the everything is alright card and I got really good at acting.

"So dearie what are you going to do today" my mother ask as I walked down the stairs and into the kitchen. I grabbed apple juice and poured me a cup.

"Um I don't know actually" I mumbled looked at my parents which looked weird. They were dressed in shirt and jeans. I almost forgot they were teachers for second.

"You can clean the house" my dad joked making food and I groaned.

"Dad, funny but I don't know what are you two doing" I asked looking at them.

"We think might go shopping or go date don't know, do you need anything" my mom asked as she took sip of my coco.

"Hey go get your own" I mumbled and groaned and pulled cup closer to him.

"Nah, well we could see Warren" her father suggests and I sat up nibbled her lip. I would like to see him one last time.

"Can I come with I kind of miss him" I said quietly and they pulled me into a hug. No questions ask I went upstairs to get music and stuff I can have in the car. I told my parents after getting water bottle that I was going to the car. I text same

Me to Sam: Hey Sam, it's me of course um, I'm going to see Warren with my parents. I Will call you later. I'm thinking about tomorrow. more later -Lu.

I sent it and turned off my phone closing my eyes. I can do this act like my old self for day. Maybe I will believe I will get better if I do this. I thought as I leaned back in the car. My phone was being charged thanks to the car and sighed.

I most of fallen asleep which I did that a lot sleep because my mom was waking me up as we already parked. The college my brother was going to was 6-hour drive away. So he would come home for thanksgiving and Christmas would be fine. Plus, it was a really good college. There was Different brick building on campus. One for each whatever it was. There was dorms and parent day to come and visit.

It was weird different from high school but seem like it in way. You could see different places for different people. Everything had a place and I knew I Wouldn't belong here. I kept my head down and followed my parents inside one of the brick buildings. I played with necklace and stayed quite.

I heard my brothers voice and looked up to my parent walking into the room which looked clean. My brother shared it with someone but he wasn't there. It was really nice, medium size with all the things. On his side he had more book he hugged mom and dad than me. He had a beard almost and it was rather confusing

"Lucy you're here" he said happily and hugged me. I know he was too happy to notice that I wasn't but I knew that was important right now. He hugged me tight and I nibbled my lip and sighed.

"Heir said softly and poked my brother. Parents got well they wanted us to talk and said they wanted to talk about to leave us talk to each other.

I sat down next to him and looked down as he poked me.

"Hey how are you." he asked and poked me back worried as heck.

"Um.... I think I have to do something and I know you will say no and try to stop me but" I took a breath and looked up at him. He was confused. He looked at me worried.

"Sis what do you mean' he asked me and I looked at my hands so I wouldn't see the look on his face.

"I'm going to confront it and I don't know if I will make it through" I mumbled not clearly thankfully but he looked at me confused and worried. He didn't reply because parents walked in. They wanted him to give us a tour of the area. Which was okay with me cause well I didn't care.

I walk with I family as they toured the area and she stayed quite making small comments about random stuff before they had to leave, I looked down closed her eyes when I got in the car and checked I messages.

Sam to Lucy: Alright meet you tomorrow at 5 am.

I text him back and closed my eyes knowing as I might as well get the best sleep I ever got before.