Reasons to Hate the Commute

#1282 Molecular Bonding on the Train ~ DocMartensKoAsanNa

My friends and I used to joke about "molecular bonding" back when all people did to fit inside a packed train car was squeeze in together.

But now it's actually a thing. And nobody likes it. And I want the L line to get rid of it as soon as possible.

I guess it's a good thing only the L line has it, while it's on its dry run...problem is, the dry run should've ended a couple of months ago, and it's still around. So now I wonder if what's going on now is still called a "dry run" or if it's become something permanent. The signs all still say "passenger fusion dry run," though, I just have to state that for the record...

The Japanese figured it out ages ago, how you make 400 people fit into a car with a 300-people standing capacity: you simply reduce everyone to a semi-liquid state, smush them together, and then it's like transporting densely packed jelly.

Easy, yes?

Count on Pinoys to mess up something so simple. Only in the Philippines.

These are only some of the things that are bugging me:

1. There really, REALLY should be some sort of insurance policy. All developed countries that employ PF in public transportation has one, folks. Read up.

It's annoying when your foot ends up attached to somebody else's leg, because the only way you both know is when you get off the train, you realize you're wearing somebody else's Rusty Lopez, and you look around and somebody else is walking away with the left Yeezy your cousin working in Dubai gave you as a Christmas gift.

2. Belongings SHOULD NOT get mixed up! Period! It's just not enough to have a stuff-porting terminal at every station. You don't really want to leave your shoes there, but you still have to risk getting it mixed up because the train you take to and from work every day insists on using a faulty PF system.

There's too much faith put into those stuff-porting terminals. So you can leave your belongings at Tayuman and get it back at Baclaran, no hassle, right? But people have reported losing their stuff at those terminals. Other people claim them, or they're claimed by the terminal workers, who knows. No CCTV can monitor how stuff is ported, and stuff gets lost in transit all the time.

Also, what if you forget you had a 1000-peso bill in your pants pocket? You may get your pants back, but your 1000-peso bill mysteriously ends up in someone else's pants.

There have been quite a few accounts of this, and I feel like government officials should take a look at this already. No waiver signed before stepping on the platform will ease the pain of losing a valuable thing you forgot to take out of your pocket.

On the other hand, I really like that this means no mobile gadgets on the train. Nobody gets to conduct loud, rowdy conversations with people who aren't even there. It's refreshing.

3. I know fusion numbs the skin cells and puts a few millimeters of space between every body part, which means actual contact is prevented, which in turn means harrassment is pretty much eliminated (because why bother, you can't feel it and neither can the other person). But it's still pretty annoying when your eyeballs are right up against somebody's mouth and that person makes lewd gestures with his or her tongue. A friend of mine also reported watching as some hardcore pervert's hand was making rubbing motions over her derriere, which at the time was located within the line of sight of her left eye.

4. people SHOULDN'T BE ABLE TO TALK when in a disconnected state. when your ear is RIGHT UP AGAINST somebody else's mouth, and this mouth is talking to somebody whose ear is WAY OVER AT THE OTHER END OF THE CAR, somebody needs to go to jail.

Related to that, people shouldn't be able to spread the good word about Our Lord and Savior, or rant and rail about certain politicians and government policies (or even certain train lines' crappy PF systems), when people can't get away from them. The best the victims could do in such a situation is to helplessly roll their eyes.

5. SPONTANEOUS SINGING SHOULD BE BANNED. Somehow it happens on ALMOST EVERY TRIP and everyone is expected to sing along. JUST BECAUSE MY SHOULDERBLADE IS RIGHT UP AGAINST THE SMALL OF YOUR BACK, THAT DOESN'T MEAN I WANT TO SING ALONG.

"It's experimental," is the deathless excuse. But that's no excuse at all, when you think about it. Even experimental things have proper safety measures.

And I'm not saying it's all bad. On some occasions, it's been known to improve mood and relax the muscles - kinda like a deep massage that you can take several times a day. It's also been known to improve empathy, especially if you undergo it with family or friends. The Japanese have a term for it: "モレバンド," which sounds suspiciously like "moribund," but actually is just a shorter way of saying "molecular bonding" - which I'm pretty sure is a term my friends and I invented. I hereby claim copyright.

All I'm saying is, if you're going to steal technology, do it right. You don't look at developed countries, take cheap materials, and try to cobble together something that LOOKS like it does what those things do. It's still public transport. The people are still paying for it. You still need to care about your passengers, for goodness' sake!