JUMP

Part 3

Tsuzuku P.O.V

The silence of the apartment was eerie. Every creak of a floorboard, any sound of doors slamming upstairs or downstairs, any sound of talking, footsteps, movement, made me jump. I was now alone. And the day dragged on. It dragged on so painfully slowly. Any essence of doubt that rose within me was quickly buried away again.

...there was little doubt, anyway.

'1 New Notification: Meto: What's wrong? You didn't turn up today to rehearsals? That's unlike you.'

I sighed.

'1 New Notification: Meto: We're worried, you know?'

Liar.

'1 New Notification: Meto: I'll come round later.'

Why? I won't be at my apartment anyway.

I switched off the mobile phone that insisted on pissing me off. I threw my body onto the sofa that faced my television and switched it on. The depressing news. A comedy show. An anime that Meto likes. A documentary about Aokigahara. Everything seemed dull. The more I sat there flicking through seemingly endless channels, the more the silence and loneliness crept up on me. Sitting up slowly, I pulled my feet up onto the leather seat and hugged my arms around my knees, staring blankly at some random news reporter smiling on the screen as she interviewed some girls.

"So, what do you think about MEJIBRAY being at the top of the charts?"

Oh fuck off.

I switched off the TV, then threw the remote to the floor, staring glumly as it bounced noisily, the back flying off and two rusty batteries tumbling out.

The evening crept up slowly, and I watched the grey sky transform itself into blackness. The ache in my stomach pestered me, it pulled me back and forth, as if it were trying to split me in two. Yet I couldn't pin down whether it was nerves or the unending pain. It wasn't long now. Just a few more hours. But those hours ate away at my soul.

What was I to be nervous about anyway? There was nothing here left for me. I had already failed many times, so perhaps this time I could permanently end my troubles. Being here, with MEJIBRAY, it's just constant stress. We started off so well, but it went downhill so fast. I hadn't noticed until then, that the sun had almost fully disappeared, and the cloudy night sky invited more and more dullness to the earth. My apartment had become dark and it made me sleepy.

I allowed my pale body to fall down to the comfort of the sofa once more, and I rested my tired eyes. But they did not rest, as anticipation and worry filled my mind. I wonder what it's like to be at the 'end'. Anxiety had always been present within my ruined brain, but tonight it plagued me. I had made up my mind, yet I was still petrified. I knew it had to be done.

Nine.
Nine-thirty.
Ten.
Ten-thirty-three.
Ten-fifty-nine.
Eleven-zero-three.
Eleven-twenty-two.
Eleven-thirty-one.
Eleven-forty-five.
Eleven-fifty-three.
Fifty-four fifty five six seven...

Midnight struck.

I stood.

I didn't need a coat – perhaps the cold would numb my hideous emotions.

I gazed out of my apartment window, staring down at Tokyo city. Couples walked about, smiling as they clutched huge shopping bags and grotesque amounts of food. Oh I wish I could keep relationships. But that rarely happened when you were Tsuzuku. There was no crying. The hideously large amount of pollution stained the sky. I thought I would be able to see the stars just one more time. I thought I'd be able to say goodbye to them, as they had helped me through many sleepless nights. I would often stare at them, finding shapes among them, the twinkling lights that calmed me so. Insomniacs' friend.

Good bye.

I licked my dry lips, before opening the front door. Goodbye apartment. Carrying a bottle of vodka in one hand, I headed out of the large building alone, one hand clutching at my skinny sides to deal with the bitter cold, and one hand bringing the bottle to my lips so that I could drink the poison that seemed more seductive than it had ever done before. My head was in some warped world of dark reality-fantasy. Was this really happening?

Meto P.O.V

I had spent the afternoon talking to MEJIBRAY. We needed to sort this out.

And then I visited Tsuzuku. It was midnight but I knew he'd be up – he never slept at night anyway, the poor man. I brought with me beer: it was light and weak so that it wouldn't damage him anymore, but instead maybe lift his spirits. Even a tiny bit.

~

"Tsuzuku?" No.

I knocked repeatedly. I pulled out my phone, ringing his number, multiple times. But no answer – which was when I realised that the buzzing from inside the apartment was the vocalist's own mobile phone.

"Tsuzuku?! Tsu!" I banged a fist against the door, shouting, sobbing against it. I didn't want to go in. We all knew something was going wrong in his head but it was too soon for our expectations to become a reality. I didn't want to see what he was like behind the door.

I leaned against the door, a tear following a curved path across my porcelain cheek. The door handle moved under my weight. It was... unlocked? My heart rate quickened even more. I didn't think it was possible.

"...Tsu...?"

I twisted the handle slowly, my palms sweating immensely, I felt sick, I felt as if I were about to pass out. But I knew Tsu felt worse.

The door creaked open slowly, and I immediately felt around the walls to find the light switch. On. It revealed a horrific sight: bottles and cans strewn across the floor and table, "Tsu?", his phone among them, it obviously had fallen from the sofa, which was crookedly facing a corner of the room instead of facing forward towards the TV. Slowly I approached it. Tissues... they were stained... red.

No...

The kitchen: unwashed pans and dishes piled up carelessly, probably left for days... weeks. A tap dripped and dripped and dripped. The bedroom – a cheap, unmade bed, it looked as if it were about to collapse, probably from all the cheap prostitutes he had always enticed in when he couldn't soothe his head at night. The bathroom – empty.

"Tsuzuku..."

~~~~~

Finally - I hate this story so much but its brilliant to write. If you're wondering about my updates, lately I haven't been feeling so good and its caused me to feel that none of my new chapters are interesting - I hope you can be patient with me. On the brighter side - I turned 16 yesterday! (12th) yaaay~! Please comment vote read hug. Don't worry - it gets better in the end.