After // ziall

Chapter 39

I look at Zayn, then at Noah, and back to Zayn. There is no way this is going to go well.

"What are you doing here?" I ask Zayn, even though I do not want to hear the answer, especiallynot in front of Noah.

"What do you think I am doing here! You snuck out on me while I was asleep, what the hell was that?" Zayn booms. I hold my breath as his voice echoes off the wall. Noah's face flashes with anger and I know he is beginning to put the puzzle pieces together.

I am torn between trying to explain to Noah what is going on and trying to explain to Zayn why I left.

"Answer me!" Zayn yells and stands in front of my face. I am surprised when Noah steps between us.

"Don't yell at him." He warns Zayn. I am frozen in place when Zayn's face twists in anger. Why is he so mad that I left? He would have kicked me out anyway. I need to say something before this all blows up in my face. He is probably only angry that he didn't get to make me cry first.

"Zayn.. please don't do this right now." I beg. If he leaves now, I can try to explain to Noah what is going on.

"Do what Niall James?" Zayn asks and walks around Noah. I hope Noah keeps his distance, I don't think Zayn will hesitate to knock him over. Noah is pretty buff, especially compared to Zayn's lean body but I have no doubt Zayn will hold his own, and most likely win. What the hell is happening in my life that I have to worry about Noah and Zayn fighting?

"Zayn, please just go and we will talk about this later." I say and Noah shakes his head.

"Talk about what? What the hell is going on Niall." Noah cuts in. Oh god.

"Tell him, go on and tell him." Zayn says. I can't believe that he is doing this. I know how cruel he can be but this takes it to a whole other level.

"Tell me what Niall?" Noah asks.

"Nothing, just that I stayed at Zayn and Liam's last night." I lie. I try to match my blue eyes to Zayn's in hope that he will stop this now but he looks away immediately.

"Tell him Niall or I will." Zayn growls and I begin to cry.

"Noah.. I.. me and Zayn have been.." I start. Zayn's angry face shifts to smug. I can't believe I spent the night with him, last night elt amazing but I knew I would end up regretting it. I just didn't know it would get this bad first.

"Oh. My. God." Noah stutters and his eyes begin to water. How could I do this to him? What the hell was I thinking? Noah is so kind and Zayn is cruel enough to make me tell Noah about us in front of him. His hands go to his forehead and he shakes his head.

"How could you Niall? After everything we have been through? When did this start?" Tears stream down his face from his blue eyes. I have never felt this terrible, I caused those tears. I look over at Zayn and then back to Noah. My hate for Zayn consumes me and I shove him back instead of answering Noah. Zayn is caught off guard and stumbles backwards but steadies himself before he falls.

"Noah, I am so sorry. I don't know what I was thinking." I am being honest, I don't know what the hell I was thinking.

I suppose I was thinking that Zayn could be decent and aybe I could break up with Noah and date Zayn. How stupid could I be? Or that I could stay away from Zayn and Noah would never know about what happened between us. The problem is that I can't stay away from Zayn. I am too far gone, too far under his spell, and he didn't hestitate to curse me.

Both are stupid and naïve options but I haven't made one good choice since I have met Zayn.

"I don't know what you were thinking either, I don't even know you anymore." Noah shouts and walks towards the door.

"Noah please! Wait!" I scream and rush after him. Zayn grabs my arm and tries to pull me back.

"Don't touch me! I can't believe you! This is low Zayn, even for you!" I scream and jerk my arm out of his grasp. I push him again. I have never pushed anyone in my life except him, multiple times.

"If you go after him, I am done." He says and my mouth falls open. Done with what?

"Done? Done with what? Fucking with my emotions? I hate you! You can't end something that never began." I say, my voice no longer shouting. His hands fall to his sides and his mouth opens but no words come out.

"Noah!" I call and rush out the door. I run down the hall and finally catch up to him in the parking lot. He notices me and walks faster.

"Noah, please listen. I am sorry, so sorry. I was drinking, I know that isn't an excuse but I.." I wipe my eyes and his face softens.

"I can't listen to any more.." He says. His eyes are red. I reach for his hand and he pulls away.

"Noah please, I am so sorry. Please forgive me." I can't lose him and Zayn in one day. Even though Zayn was never mine and never would be, it still hurts to see his newest lever of hatred for me. Especially after the way he held me and called my name in his sleep.

"I just need some time, Niall. I don't know what to think." He says and runs his hand over his perfectly gelled hair.

"Okay." I sigh in defeat. He just needs time to get over this and we can go back to normal.

"I love you Niall." He says and catches me by surprise when he kisses my forehead and climbs into his car.