"Let... Me... Hurt..." I sobbed. I was shivering. It hadn't been this cold before...
"I need this... I NEED THIS!" I'm crazy in pain. I'm crazy happy in pain. But its okay because because Rachel is right here and she's kind of holding my hands and oh my word those eyes... Those eyes of hers...
"Shh... Sh. You're okay."
I'm dizzy. Its weird. I stare at her eyes and get dizzy. I blink. I giggle. I sob.
"Rachel..."
"Yeah?"
"I like your eyes..." I didn't know I was going to say that. I didn't know I was going to speak at all. I was afraid. I was afraid of a lot of things. I was afraid of the power coursing through my veins from the fleece and the power in her eyes alone and the weakness that is me. I am weak. I am afraid. Everything at the moment scares me. The sounds of people outside scare me. People inside scare me. The person I am inside.
"I'm not a good person Rachel..." I start telling her a story about my parents and my childhood. How I did everything wrong. How they didn't love me. How I just kept doing everything wrong. And that's why no one like me. I painted pictures of the things that happened. I was crying to myself. I felt her listen as I talked. I felt her hold my hand. I squeezed back.
"No, Octavian no..."
"I let them hurt me... I let them. Its my fault. It is... stop caring for me why would anyone care for me..." She takes the knife far away, a look of worry on her face. She must know that if I could I would grab it again and go crazy with it. But I wouldn't hurt her. I wouldn't hurt her... Her eyes... They're so... My eyes, my stupid, inadequate eyes, they strain to see hers through the burn.
"Rachel," My mouth would say if I didn't choke on every salty sob,
"Never blink."
"Rachel, I saw through the mask the whole time." I would tell her if I could but words are failing me even though now all I want is the truth. There isn't any truth I can get from her. There is only what I can tell her. So I find a way around the words and I tell her everything. Every moment. Every hurt. How much better she is than the people I knew. How much I want her to never hurt like that again.
How much I promise never to hurt her. How I'd just go away and live in Alaska if that was what she wanted.
How I'd try my hardest not to kill myself if that would make her happy.
Those eyes and that smile are such a beautiful duo.
I'd die for them.
I'd live for them.
I've never felt like this.
Vulnerable, well I've felt like that, but caring.
I haven't cared for so long.
I keep telling her stories, I'm mumbling, rambling, thinking that I'm going to run out of things to say but when I do I just cry and tell her that she is the best person. The best person. I keep crying, emphasis of how amazing she is.
I have never felt for a human the way I feel for Rachel.
It is so cold. I don't know how to feel.
I don't know if I can breathe anymore.
The words spill out of me, easier to say then I thought.
And a calm comes that I can't fight.
It is so so cold and would that I could hurt again.
But if it would make Rachel happy I would not.
If it would let me see those eyes and smile dancing together again I would never again.
Oh please gods of olympus let me live so that I see that smile and eyes again.
----
Hello and good morning to you all!
I realize is not Sunday, but I haven't had the time to post yesterday. Also, I apologize for not posting the previous weekends and, even though I have no excuse for that, I have an excuse for posting today.
You see, next weekend I'll be leaving on holidays and I won't be posting for two weekends, almost three. So, I decided to post now the chapters I owe you and the ones I will, since practically is the only moment free I have while getting ready!
Here are the chapters!
Sis/Bro, Your Shadow is Hot!: 5 CHAPTERS! (Nope, not insane).
Maidenhood (adopted from TheColorofBoom): 5 CHAPTERS as well!!
Rise of Ouranos (ReWrite) (former collab with LordNitro): 5 CHAPTERS
Quest: Matchmade (former collab with Hugs6): 5 CHAPTERS
Masked Hearts (former collab with Hugs6): 5 CHAPTERS
I wish you all have a great Monday and, obviously, I'll see you the last weekend of March!
xoxo, SilverHuntresses
YOU ARE READING
Masked Hearts
Fanfiction[Collab with Hugs6] #Octachel Octavian survives the explosion and is banished from Camp Jupiter, forcing him to live at Camp Half Blood. The campers can't figure out who is being punished, them or Octavian, and practically refuse to help, but one Or...
