Masked Hearts

Chapter 14 - Octavian's P.O.V.

I could scream. I don't. I could search for faces to blame. But I let them run together to paint the portrait of all those I've hated before. I could convince my foes that I'm not to blame. I was so good at convincing once. I could do it again. If nothing else I could beg. Tell them that it was all Rachel's fault. But she is already hurting so much. I don't want to hurt her anymore than she has to hurt. I have a plan, a dream and desire. But it doesn't involve escaping those who toss me around and drag me through the camp that bleeds together. I could have come to see this camp as a lovely place. I could have been magnificently happy here, in the shadows, always in the shadows so I wasn't hated more than I already was. I learned the less people I saw the more I could slip out of the mask that turned me into a commanding snot head who learned that he could believe he would rule the world. I thought I could rule the world. I tried to play it like my pawn, and became the pawn of someone else... How stupid was I.

I stumble as the drag me. I can see them but I choose not to. I don't want to see them. I don't want to have to hate them. I'm too tired of hating. They cast me outside of camp. I'm busted up. My face, my bones. I'm at the lowest place I've ever been, but I would be sailing if I could just know that she would be okay. If I could just ensure here safety I'd be fine...

My shirt is ripped up. The blue one that I like. I put it back on. It makes me a little anxious to see it in tatters. Its the only color I can see. Everything else is gray mud. The camp was so full of colors, colors granted I never got to enjoy. And now the only color left is my ripped up blue shirt which is turning to gray mud as I try to figure out where I am. I know I could go back in. I could just crawl back in. To be thrown out again. Play that little game until I can't drag myself any longer and then let myself die in the gray mud. But...

I was wrong. There is a color. One outside of gray mud. It's green. Crazy bright. Matching with the upturned corners of her mouth. It's the color of Rachel, odd thing to say, but it makes me happy, and it makes me cry. And I was already crying. I can't cry harder... I can. I can and I am. I thought I cried harder than I have ever cried before. But here I am sobbing more than I ever could have. Now I know I care for her. Now I know.

Now I know what I need to give up.

I cry out into the gray mud evening.

It's a different world on the other side of the barrier. I have lost that world, and any chance of being at home there. But Rachel hasn't. Not yet. So I beg.

"gods... Hear me! I AM A RUTHLESS AND TERRIBLE CREATURE, PUNISH ME AND SAVE MY FRIEND! SAVE RACHEL ELIZABETH DARE PLEASE! MAKE HER FORGET ME. MAKE THEM ALL FORGET ME. PLEASE!" I get someone's attention. Someone who can make that deal. Someone who will make that deal. My soul in eternal punishment, as it was always supposed to be, in exchange for everyone who has ever known me forgetting my existence. The world may get to have peace now. I can only hope. I do hope. I hope with all my soul. The one that I didn't believe I had, that no one believed I had. The one that is waiting for doom so the world can have peace.

Heh.

Maybe I am a hero.

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Hello, guys!

First of all, welcome to April! To those who finish school in June, you're closer to summer! To the rest, well... Hang in there! Almost 8 months to summer! I know, it's not a consolation, but it's all I have...

I hope you had a great Easter or April Fool's or Spring Break, depending what is your religion/belief. I would had posted yesterday if my wifi hadn't acted funny, almost pranking me! Today, as it is for Argentinians, it's a holiday in honor of the veterans who fought on the Falkland Islands. I'm honoring both sides today, as a life is a life, no matter what flag surrounds that life (on an related/unrelated note, I'm glad my grandmother doesn't know english or she would skin me for thinking that!).

Anyway! Onto what you're interested! My stories!

Rise of Ouranos (ReWrite) (former collab with LordNitro): 1 chapter!

Sis/Bro! Your Shadow is Hot!: 1 chapter!

Maidenhood (adopted from TheColorofBoom): 1 chapter!

Quest: Matchmade (former collab with ReeReeWithAngst, aka Hugs6): 1 chapter!

Masked Hearts (former collab with ReeReeWithAngst, aka Hugs6): 1 chapter!

As a final note, I'd like to inform/preview you that I'm planning a new Solangelo fic, which would be posted on Sunday 13th of May... Some people were asking on, and I had come up with a great plot, hope you'll like it...

Have a great week!

xoxo, SilverHuntresses