Cold Hearts - Mark Tuan fanfic

5 - Numb

One whole week of hell and you're already numb. Oblivious of what others are saying. You walk out the building, earphones on, music turned loud. 

Somebody taps you on the shoulder, making you turn around. 

You raise one eyebrow at Junior. 

"You know we have a game tonight, right? Are you going?"

"I'm not a cheerleader anymore." You put your earphones back on but he pulls it back down. 

"It's still different without you. Besides, I bet Mark wants to see you there."

"I don't think so."

"El," Peniel immediately puts his arm around you and pulls you away. 

"We're having a house party at my place tonight with the team. Wanna join us?"

"Nope."

"C'mon." Then he whispers. "You need a reason not to go to their game, don't you?"

"Fine."

"Pick you up at eight?"

You just wave at him, put back your earphones and continue down the steps to the parking lot. He follows you quietly down. You stop on your tracks as you see Mark leaning on his car. Beside him is a giggling Britney. You turn away, but not before he sees you. Why is he so sweaty? When he was with you...no...when you were with him, you always made sure he changed into fresh clothes after basketball practice. 

Ignore and just walk.

With your chin up, you do just that. You feel an arm around your shoulder, it's still Peniel. Disappointed, you roll your eyes at him. 

"Just walk. Pretend you're happy." He whispers. Without knowing, your lips turn up into a smile. You can feel Mark's eyes follow you until you get to your car. 

"I'll see you tonight," Peniel shouts intentionally, as you drive out the campus. 

Their party is a lot different from the party you're used to. Aside from the soccer players, there were only their girlfriends and some very close friends to them. Around twenty people sit at a long table by the pool. No loud music, just one guy playing the guitar with the others singing along. No drunk, shirtless guys running around. Here, they tell jokes and laugh, passing the shot glass around. 

Instead of feeling bored, you find yourself liking it. It's somewhat peaceful....comfortable. 

"We don't really do loud parties," Peniel tells you. 

"I'm actually enjoying this." 

"Really?" He eyes you suspiciously but then smiles when he sees you're sincere. "Good to hear that."

You expected his friends to loathe you, rather, they are welcoming. Unlike your judgmental 'ex-friends' they don't care about your story. They just enjoy each other's company. 

But you can't help but miss them - Mark, Phoebe, Sasha.... 

Three weeks after the news about your dad, the school has quieted down a little. You still hear whispers, but not that much. People still stare, but not that many. 

Gym class isn't as bad anymore. They leave you alone. Nobody still talks to you, except Peniel's friends, but it's better. You see Phoebe having a hard time with the ropes, why isn't anybody helping her? You want to run to her and hold it for her, but you stop yourself. She wouldn't want your help anyway.