Perfect and imperfect

Texting to talking

Izzy: Delaney please talk to me it's been a week and a half

Izzy: u haven't been to any rehearsals

Izzy: *image attached* we need to learn a new song. I hope u respond soon

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Izzy: I feel like I've given up on trying to get a reply

Izzy: I'll just text u everyday to let u know I'm still here

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Izzy: I really do feel like I'm losing u. Plz don't put me through this again

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Izzy: I can't imagine what your going through but I really wish I could help u

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Izzy: I talked to Jess today. She told me your back in school. I hope your at rehearsal too

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Izzy: u weren't at rehearsal yesterday. At least ur in school. That's good

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Izzy: I told u I'd check in everyday.

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Izzy: it's been a week of this y can't u just reply

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Izzy: I hope I didn't sound rude yesterday I kno u might not b ready to talk to me bc of everything that's happened

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Izzy: I was stupid to think ud open up to me

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Delany: u didn't text yesterday. R u ok?

*Izzy would like to FaceTime you*

"Delaney!" Izzy screamed with her earphones in. She looked beautiful with her hair pulled back in a ponytail. I wish she didn't look beautiful. If I didn't feel this way I would've talked to Daisy more about happy things.

"Hey," I managed to say, "Are you okay?"

"Of course I'm fine! Why wouldn't I be?" She said with the same amount of energy as before.

"You, well, you didn't text yesterday," my voice was cracking as I talked because I haven't been talking often.

In response, Izzy made a sound that was mixed between a laugh, a gasp, and  a sigh. Isn't this great? She's laughing at me.

"I'm sorry," I muttered.

"Why? Why are you sorry?" She asked, confused.

"I'm wasting your time. All I ever do is waste your time. You have been wasting time worrying about me and texting me instead of getting on with your life. You couldn't keep it up forever, you have friends and people who love you. Of course you wouldn't want to waste anymore time texting me. Listen you don't have to talk to me right now I know you don't really care that much about me. I'm wasting your time."

"Delaney! Delaney! Del," Izzy tries to calm me down as tears form in my eye, "Del, I didn't text because I thought you wanted nothing to do with me. Your not a waste of time, your my best friend!"

"I hate that I'm only your best friend," I meant to say that in my head. Whoops.

"What?"

"Nothing," okay good I don't think she heard that.

"Some best friend I've been. You've lost someone close to you and the best I've done is send you music to learn and then make you think I've gotten hurt or something by not texting you," she frowned.

"That's not true! You've been a great frie-" I start but she cuts me off.

"No I haven't. I've been lying to you for so long!" She says while looking down.

"Then tell me the truth!" I say getting annoyed.

"But then you'll hate me!" And now she's annoyed.

"Nothing you could ever do could make me hate you!" I try to reason.

"Really?" Izzy's yelling at me with an anger I've never heard in her before, "Because once I did absolutely nothing and you avoided me for a whole month!"

I opened my mouth to speak but no words came out. She was right. The tears were so hot they felt like droplets of fire burning down my face.

"I'll let you get back to whatever you're doing," I mutter as I move my finger to end the FaceTime call.

"No, Delaney, wait! Please, I didn't mean that!" She says.

"But it's true," I reply.

"But I don't care. I have you back now. That's all that matters! You are really important to me, Delaney."

"If I matter that much then why do you lie to me?" I didn't mean to say that but I did and I said it with an attitude. Whoops. Again. This girl, I swear I can't think around her. I start to speak again, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say that!"

"No, your right. I'll tell you the truth, but you have to promise not to be mad!" She says.

"You don't have to," I tell her.

"Yes I do!"

"No you don't. You clearly don't want to. I was rude and now you think you need to but you really, really don't!" I say and I think she listened because she just sat there for a little while before talking again.

"I hate how you can't trust me," she starts.

"But I do trust you."

"I hate how I don't talk to you," she starts again.

"But that's kind of my fault for not responding for the past two weeks."

"I hate how your not letting me talk right now."

"But- oh wait. Sorry, you can talk," I grumble at the end of that.

"Delaney, you need to know I trust you and you can trust me."

"I do know that and I do trust you!" She groans in a response as if I'm not understanding something.

"Delaney," she sighed, "I love you, ya know?"

"Yeah, I know, I love you too. We kind of just said how we are best friends," I simply say. I don't understand where this is going.

"No, Del, I mean it! I really care about you and-"

"I get it! You don't need to say anything else. It's fine."

"No you don't get it! I really-"

"Izzy! It's fine! Listen, thank you for the music that I needed the other day. I think it's best for me to go now," I say.

"But Del! I, well, I, um. You know what? Never mind. You clearly have a lot going on. I'm still here for you! Forever and always! I'll always be here," she sounded close to tears but I didn't really think much of it. I just nodded and muttered a goodbye as I pressed the button to end the call.