Augustus Waters: Longer than Forever(The Fault in Our Stars)

Chapter 2

Van Houten was right. Some infinities are bigger then other infinities. Like for example my infinity with Gus is bigger than any other. I can't think of my life without Gus. He's the first I talk to about, well, everything. I still can't imagine that he will be gone. I know it will be soon, but my body can't cope with it. I think of Gus, and I imagine calling him when my parents are being the overprotective parents they are. I can't not imagine there to be a voice, trying to comfort me. Telling me that it will all be okay.

Today I went to the hospital to see Gus. He was sleeping, and the nurse was still unsure when he would wake and whether he would at all.

As I watch him, he looks almost peaceful. He looks strained like he's trying to hold on, but there's already nothing left.

My heart aches at that thought and it doesn't go away. I still wonder why Augustus deserves this. He doesn't. I would happily take his place to know that he would be able to live again.

A knock at the door disrupts my thoughts.

"Come in." I say.

The door opens and I see Isaac stumbling in. He may have gotten his surgery a while ago, but he still is hasty on his walk.

"Hi". He replies. " I got your note. Is Gus okay?"

"He could be better." I whisper, knowing that he might not be here at all. "He woke up yesterday and he quickly fell asleep after I left. At least that's what the doctor said."

Isaac comes over but without stumbling. He reaches his hand out, and I grab it, leading him over.

He sits beside me. We sit in silence for what I think is 40 minutes. In that time, I feel like we are dedicating that moment to Gus. Augustus, the love of my life, the one who made me think that my life was worth everything. Finally, after ages, I break the comfortable silence.

"I don't get it. Why Augustus?" I strain my voice from shouting.

"I don't know." Isaac replies, calmly.

I don't get how Isaac can be so relaxed at a time like this. He knew Gus longer than me. He should be the one ready to explode, not me.

"Why aren't you sad? Do you not care that Gus only has only minutes left?! He may even be gone!" I exclaim, shouting at Isaac.

"You think I don't care!" Isaac shouts back. "Gus was always there for me, and he will always be apart of me! He went through everything with me! With Monica and my surgery!"

He calms down. "I just think that Gus would've wanted us to be civil and not like we are right now. I think we owe it to him just for a few minutes." He says, so quietly I have to strain to hear him.

And with that I start bawling.

And I can't stop.

I ask Isaac to leave me alone. And he does.

I don't know how long I stay in there. The nurse comes in after what could be minutes to hours.

"Honey, I'm sorry but I think you're going to have to go now. Augustus needs some treatment from the doctor." The nurse says with empathy covering her eyes.

"Okay." I respond.

I look at Gus again but it's so blurry because of the tears in my eyes.

I repeat myself, "Okay."

But that time it was meant for Augustus.




AUTHOR'S NOTE

Thank you all so much!! I just came on Wattpad again and I had no idea this story would get 250+ reads!! Thank you all so much I can't get over this! I'll try to update more now that I know someone is reading this. :)