Are You Sure?

Chapter 12

Emma's P.O.V.
I quietly close the door and look at the clock. It's 10:32pm now. I'm counting down the minutes. It's not that I don't like Gabe, I just don't know if the way to get to know each other again is to stay in the same bed on the first night. I mean, yes, I loved him. I love him..? I don't know. I mean, the conflict is obviously within the fact that I didn't think I would see him ever again, and I convinced myself he was gone for good. Because, I couldn't handle the pain and I knew that he would want me to be happy.

"Emma?" I hear my name, and jump slightly.
"Uh." I clear my throat," Yeah?"
"I'm not staying." He says.
"What?" I say turning towards him.
"Yeah." He says.
"Wh-Why?" I ask. "You just found me and you want to leave again?"
"We aren't the same people we were. This is a whole different life. I came to make sure that you were safe; that you were okay. Now that I see that you are, I'm leaving." He says, staring at me intently.
"But, it's safe here. It's not safe out there. But, you know that. I couldn't bare the thought of you out there alone again."
I say.

It's one hundred percent true. I couldn't bare the thought of my old love being sent out into that world. Or almost anyone for that matter. This place is a safe haven. Why would anyone want to leave that? I mean, I will never let my guard down, but why leave here?

"Why do you want me to stay?" Gabe asks, putting his hand on my side gap.
My eyes flutter to his hand, " Gabe? Is that even a question? I love you. I always will." I reply.
"Emma, " He says, his eyes looking down. I remember how he always did that when he felt vulnerable. "Do you still love me that way?" He asks.
"Honestly? I don't know. It's been a long long time." I answer honestly. I reach a hand up and move the hair out of his deep brown eyes. I always hated how it would fall.
"I understand." He says.

"I remember these gaps on your sides. Deep." He says, stroking my side. My shirt slightly moving up.
"I remember looking at you...and your curves. When I would hold your sides and my hands would perfectly settle perfectly in them." He says.

He looks up from my sides and looks into my eyes. I slightly smile. "Seems like forever ago." I whisper.
"To long." He says.

All the reasons why I loved Gabe come flooding back. He kisses me and it was different this time.
"Goodnight." He says, turning over.
"What a gentleman." I snicker.
Gabe's silent laugh gives me chills. I missed his laugh. Carl.

I look at the clock. We had been talking for two hours! It was now 12:36am. I hear Gabe snore and get out of bed. I tiptoe to the door and slowly close it after me. I walk to Carl's room and peek inside. I walk in and close the door. I slip under the covers to find Carl only wearing boxers. his body heat radiated toward me. It was soothing. I turn toward him as he is faced away from me. I twirl his long brown hair around my fingers.

"Mm." He flips over. I pull my hand away.
I search his face. To my surprise, his eyes are wide open.
"Carl? Why aren't you asleep? It's been two hours." I whisper.
"I don't know. I waited up." He says.
"Oh." I say, sweeping my hair back across my shoulder.
"Here." He says. My hair had fallen back onto my face. He reached over and tucked it behind my ear. His eyes stare at is hand falling through my hair.

"Are you tired?" He asks me.
"Only a little." I reply. "Why? Are you?" I ask him.
"No." He says.

We stare back and forth at each other. I fall asleep staring at Carl.

Carl's P.O.V.
She falls asleep after an hour of silent staring.
She tosses over and I pull her closer to me. "Mm." She mumbles. Her arm slides across on my arm as I was letting go. Her fingers hold mine as I lay my head in the crook of her neck.

"Goodnight." I whisper to see if she was awake.
My breath sends a visible shiver down her spine.
"G-night." She mumbles, barely audible.

Just loud enough for me to hear.