Intentional Fallacy (Book 5)

Chapter 15

I read on:

I miss Dotty. I miss my sister too. I think Anna is my sister. Isn't it true that the things you've known all along transform light and color in such a way—it's prismic, is prismic a word in this life? If not, it should be. It's The hues and shadows make me think I see other things sometimes.

"of course you know her."

I did too, once I could translate the psychology. Separate it from the natural biology. Cells move in the same direction with heredity. Darwin can explain all of it—he does in Origin of Species. I asked Jeff for a copy. He simply squinted at me. I tried to measure the length of time he held my gaze in just that way. In inches—the length of time would have equaled about eighteen. Eighteen steps towards the bookshelf. Of course I was completely elevated at that time so there would be no pacing in any direction. Instead I let the desire to research that particular fact about survival...I decided it could evaporate with the other remnants of instruction I had on the principles of human evolution.

I spotted her in my memories but then the darned stitch pulled in the knitting. I sat in Jeff's study. "Why do you get a study?" I asked him.

"Because I'm a man."

"But I am too."

I would have touched him to prove he was sitting right there but he had a curious look on his face. I remembered just that afternoon the doctor had said "you should take Margaret somewhere where they can help her."

He had that same smile. A gentleman on one side, the devil on the other.

--Eve, please admit to yourself that you know this smile. Otherwise I'll think I've gone mad. His amusement controls his eyes. He's still a frozen man inside of himself. That is why I say he's the devil--

The doctor wants me to go somewhere. There is medicine and treatment that can align this sort of thinking. When the doctor says this. Jeff—who claims now to be my husband!! He tells the doctor that I have two children! I tell them they are insane. How can a man bear children? But Jeff says "No. I rather enjoy her company."

#7,000

I don't care if it's 7,000 or 25. She came into my room. She had been walking back to his bedroom. I saw her through the glow of luminance in the hallway. Something had caused a celestial light. Maybe it truly was the light in the hallway. She was in a white nightgown and her dark hair melted down her shoulders. I can not ascertain for sure, but to me she was very demure. She came into my room. Oh I had that headache I'm sure I've mentioned it. She sat down next to me. "I remember you Margaret. Do you remember me?"

She was clairvoyant. She always had been. When we were girls we had the same secret. I asked her if she remembered it. A peculiar kind of pain that ran down my back. I told her not to cry until my funeral. At least she could do that for me.

"I want him." She whispered. I gave her my blessings as any gentleman would.

"Do you love him?" she asked. "Did you ever love him? Is that how you got pregnant?"

"Of course not." I said. "He raped me."

"Can I get you help? What can I do?"

"Find Dotty." I asked her to get a piece of paper from my writing desk. I wrote down everything I knew about Dotty. Her features, the names she passed on to me from time to time. I told her Dotty would know what to do.