Chapter 4

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Dear Journal,

It's been a while. How are you doing? Good? That's good. How am I doing? Ummm.... I think I'm fine? I honesty don't know how I'm doing. Sometimes I really want to be happy! But something is dragging me down. Something is happening to me and it's dragging me down.

I'm sorry that I haven't written in here for a few months, but I've had a lot on my mind. Like weird stuff. Stuff I don't understand and can't put into words. I wasn't writing because I was busy being caught up in my own misery.

I don't know what's happening to me and it's driving me insane, I tell you. Insane. And literally, too.

Today, during History, I was imagining things that weren't real. I thought my dad said that Maya got in a car accident when he really just asked where she was. Once I learned that Maya was just late, I started crying even harder than I had been doing before.

The nurse sent me home after I blacked out for a little bit. I am so confused. Why is this happening to me of all people? Why not someone who's already out of sorts. Why did it choose to bother me, a happy, energetic, clumsy middle-schooler?

Sorry, my mom just called. I have to go. But I will revisit you later. You get me because you don't have to.

Yours Truly,

Riley Matthews

Tuesday, February 16th

8th grade year

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