A Million Trillion Billion (What's Eating Gilbert Grape Fanfic) *ORIGINAL*

Chapter 21 - Tossing The Options

Arnie's doctors and I decided it would be best we tell Gilbert and the others today. Yesterday was a very emotional day for both Arnie and me, the tension could be picked out from a mile away.
Greg just came in and told us the guys would be here in 10 minutes, so I've rushed into the bathroom to change.
I'm almost scared of what Gilbert will say when he finds out.
We know that Arnie has to either have treatments everyday morning and night, or he can take 2 pills in the morning and be done with it. Gilbert still hasn't told me why it was such a big issue last time, but I would never make that decision without him there.
Ellen texted me yesterday, telling me some exciting news, that Leon has asked her to be his girlfriend finally! She seems so happy lately, everyone does...or did while Arnie was still at home.

Just as I'm exiting the bathroom, there's a knock on the door. Kate walks in, followed by Ellen, Becky, Leon, Amy and Gilbert.
I sit on the end of Arnie's bed as they all shuffle in.
"Oh, Arnie!" Amy falls into a hug, tears streaming down her face.
I look at Becky, who is holding a pile of scrunched up tissues, Ellen with her head in her hands, Leon with a sharp frown, looking at his feet and squeezing onto Ellen's hand.
Gilbert is expressionless. My eyes pierce into his, as if it'd make him look up.
Then he meets my gaze, and I shut my eyes, unable to bear the guilt that grumbles inside.

After everyone chatted to Arnie, we all made our way to the mostly empty cafeteria, as Arnie had to visit his primary specialists, Dr. Ben Chang and Dr. Louisa Mickle.
We take our seats at a round table.
"What did Dr. Stevens say exactly?" Amy asks me, raising her eyebrows. "He didn't say anything, he passed me the diagnosis report and I read it myself. They located th-the cancer in the left side of-of his brain." I stutter. "He..also has a condition that is still unnamed, and they're working on a cure-" I start blubbering, letting my head fall onto my arms on the table.
A hand rests on my back, I can tell it's Becky's.
"What are the options for treatment?" Leon asks. "Dr. Chang told me he's either got to have physical treatment twice a day or take a couple of pills in the morning." Amy answers, dully. "I think the medicine-" Ellen begins...
"NO! What have I told you about the medication! I forbid it." Gilbert slaps his hand down on the table, causing me to snap back up.
"Why?" I plead with him. "I can't understand if you don't tell me." I say to him.
"I don't care if you don't understand. I'm not allowing it." He says, folding his arms to let us know the discussion is over.

"I don't blame you, if that's what you're wondering." Ellen says to me, as we stroll through the gardens. It's been an hour and we're still waiting for Arnie to finish up with the doctors. I look at Ellen, with a grateful yet sad smile.
"Thank you." I tell her. "You're welcome," She says. "I'm just worried about Gilbert, I don't want him to hurt you." She looks up at me with watery dark brown eyes, and then grips onto my hand. "I think of you as a sister Janie. This whole year, I've changed, and I can definitely owe it to you." She says, squeezing my hand before letting go.
"Really?" I finally reply, with a croaky voice.
"Of course." She answers.
When I think about it, I guess Ellen really has changed. From when we first had that conversation on the couch, to all the times we watched stupid shows together, and talked about boys with Becky, and played Monopoly. I really do feel like Amy, Ellen and Becky are my sisters. I've never had such close bonds with friends before, I've never been open and trusting like this before.
I guess when you meet certain people in your life, you can change for the better.
As Ellen and I turn the corner at the end of the cobblestone path, I see Gilbert standing there, with a frown. I swallow hard, and look at my feet as we continue up towards him.
Ellen pushes a strand of hair behind my ear as a signal of comfort.
I smile at her.
"Arnie's finished. They're expecting us back in his room." Gilbert informs us. I expected him to speak more firmly than he did. His voice just sounded dull, and emotionless.

Back in Arnie's room, more chairs have been brought into the 'lounge' area. It's not huge, but it's definitely not squishy in here either.
Arnie and I sit on the couch, fingers interlocked in nervous anticipation. Gilbert sits on our right, on the edge of his seat, not being able to keep still. My leg shakes at the thought of having broken our relationship. I guess it's not a foreign thing to me, I was never liked school, I could never make any friends. I had to go to a private catholic school and I absolutely loathed it, and dreaded going each day.
I guess what got me through the day was looking forward to coming home and hanging out with Uncle Dan. I'd show him my English work (which was usually creative writing) and he'd ask me to read it to him, and then together we'd make up the rest.
Nowadays, I have Arnie to look forward to getting home to. And I can't help it, I know I'll blame myself for whatever the doctors may say right now.
Amy, Ellen, Becky and Leon are all sitting in the hospital waiting chairs we brought in as well, and the doctors sit next to each other, each holding a clipboard and looking quite official.

"Now, we have gathered you here today to discuss Arnold's diagnosis, and treatment." Dr Chang says, looking over his glasses at us. He looks quite young, however Dr Mickel does not.
They go on to tell us that Arnie is very sick and there's no chance of him coming home until next year at the earliest.
They then ask Ellen, Becky and Leon to leave the room.

"Now." Dr Mickel says once they've left. "Arnie must go on medication." She says very matter-of-factly.
I watch as Gilbert gets up from his chair immediately, causing it to squeak on the floor, and Arnie covers his ears with his hands. "Gilb-" "No." Gilbert says, cutting Amy off, ignoring her.
"Mr Grape?" Dr Mickel looks up at Gilbert with curiosity. "Is there a problem?" She asks calmly, standing up herself. "Did you even check his file?" Gilbert looks at her as if she thinks 7 is a colour.
Dr Chang stands up as well. "Mr Grape, we cannot allow you to interfere with this. Even though you are immediate family, Arnie is over 18, you have no more control over what treatment he receives." He says sternly.
"We will not risk the life of this boy. We promise to do everything in our power to get him fixed." Dr Mickel says, before reaching up to rub her temple. It looks like this isn't the first time she's experienced this.
I don't focus on feeling sorry for her stress, instead, I look at Gilbert, telling him in my mind how sorry I am, and how I wish I could start over so badly.
The thought almost brings me to tears.
I don't deserve friends like Gilbert, and I especially don't deserve a boyfriend like Arnie.
They offer what most people can never find in their hearts to give. Unconditional love.