A Million Trillion Billion (What's Eating Gilbert Grape Fanfic) *ORIGINAL*

Chapter 18 - Befriending The Enemy

As we're walking up the stairs, I realise I've been an arsehole to my best friends.
"Where's Becky?" I ask Gilbert. "Oh, she said she was going to work on some artworks at Leon's house this morning." He replies, casually. "When did she say she'd be back?" I ask anxiously. "Around dinner." He says.
"She said she needed to be out the house otherwise she'd be wallowing in a pit of sorrow." He adds. "I know." I say, not looking him in the eye.
He puts me down in front of Arnie's door, and I thank him before slowly walking inside.

My eyes light up when I see him. "Arnie!" I exclaim. "Janie!" He says back, sitting up.
I run over and hug him tight.
"Come, sit next to me." He says, patting the bed. I smile, before shoving my feet under the duvet and plopping onto the mattress. "Where were you Janie?" He asks, as I lay my head on his shoulder. "I got into a fight with Gilbert..." I say, truthfully. "Mmm?" He says, as he plays with my hair. "And...and I..." I stutter, not being able to find the words to tell him.
I just couldn't. He'd never forgive me.
And I'd never forgive me.

"You can tell me Janie." He says, and my heart breaks as he says that. I just couldn't do that to him.
"I will, I promise. I'm very tired." I say, with a yawn, feeling exhaustion wash over me.
My brain aches as I try to push out the guilt of not being able to tell him where I had been.
It kills me, lying to him.

"I'm tired too." He says, yawning. "Here, lay down." He says, pushing a pillow underneath me. I smile gratefully at him. "Thank you, honey." I lay my head down, and he lays opposite me, wrapping his hand around my waist and pulling me close.
We share a long, passionate kiss, and I feel a familiar warmth start to pulse through me again. The feeling of being loved I spose.
It's not one I often felt as a child.

Arnie tells me to roll over, and he holds me gently as I slowly fall asleep.

The next morning, I head downstairs, yawning, and attempting to unknot my hair.
"Morning." Ellen smiles, looking up from her magazine. "Hey, morning." I smile, walking over to her.
I stand behind her chair, briefly squeezing her shoulders, and skimming over the page she's on. "How are you?" I ask, walking to the kitchen.
"I'm okay. Pretty stressed, there's only one more week of the mid year holidays." She says, tightening her lips slightly. "Oh, crap I forgot about that." I roll my eyes, grabbing some eggs out the fridge.
"I wish I had forgotten." She says, sadly.
"Well, it'll go quick once we get back in there." I say, half believing my statement. "I hope so." She says.
"I'm almost a senior, which means the year after next I'll finally be able to go to Belroud." She says, hopefully. "What course are you going to take?" I ask, chucking 3 eggs into the frypan. "I have no idea." She says with a snort.
"Yeah, I had no idea either. I think I decided when I got the form." I say laughing. "I'll probably do the same thing." She laughs too.

I finish cooking the eggs, and butter some toast. Then I bring it up to Arnie, smiling at Gilbert on the way past. I frown, noticing Becky still isn't back, and Amy has disappeared too. I wonder what's going on.

"Morning sweetheart!" I say, opening Arnie's door. He's sat up in bed, reading a book. "Morning Janie!" He exclaims, waving enthusiastically at me. "I made you some breakfast." I say, bringing the tray over to him. He flattens out the duvet and I rest it on top of his lap. "Oh, thank you very much Janie! I love eggs!" He says, clapping. "I know you do, that's why I made them special for you." I say, winking. "Aw, gee thanks Janie!" He says, going slightly red. "Do you know what I love more than eggs Janie?" He asks as I plop myself down on the bed. "What?" I ask, sitting my hands on my thighs. "You." He mumbles. I grin, and lean over to kiss him. "I love you, Arnie." I say, holding one of his hands. He grins, bopping me on the nose.
"Okay. I'm going to go out and run some errands, is there anything you need?" I ask, grabbing my jeans off of his floor.
"Umm...could you get Shawshank Redemption for us to watch?" He asks, quietly. "Of course." I smile, kissing his head. "I can't wait to watch it with you." I wriggle my eyebrows, earning a laugh from him. "Okay, I'll see you very soon." I kiss him on the lips quickly. "Bye love!" He calls as I head out the door, I wave quickly before closing the door.

Once I'm in my room, I whack on my jeans and change my t-shirt.
I also tie my hair up out of the way and shove my shoes on.
"Hey." A mellow voice that I know very well says. I spin around to see Becky leaning in the door frame with an amused smile. "Oh, Becky I'm sorry." I say, running a hand through my hair. "Don worry, I talked to Gilbert about it. It'll be alright." She says sweetly. I miss Becky's flavourful optimism. A smile creeps onto my face. "Wanna run some errands with me?" I ask, swinging the house key around my finger. "Sure." She shrugs, following me out.

"I figured I went a little to hard on you the other day... I trust your judgement." Becky says, as I close the front door.
"Thanks." I smile. "That means a lot." I admit. "You're very welcome." She chuckles.
"I new it was irrational to accuse you of such a thing." She shakes her head, as we continue up the hill. "But I wasn't thinking straight. I was mad for one thing... and I guess just stressed out and tired and all the rest of it." She shrugs. "I know what you mean." I scoff, and we both laugh.
"How's Leon?" I ask, changing the subject. "He's alright, he let me crash at his house because we were up studying so late last night." She massages her temples lightly. "Really? Man I haven't gotten round to doing that at all yet really." I sigh.
"I guess I've been preoccupied." I shrug. "Yeah...haven't we all." Becky shakes her head.

We reach the video store and Becky and I head inside, nodding at the goofy looking red haired guy at the desk.
"Arnie wants to watch Shawshank with me tonight." I say, excitedly. "I love that movie!" Becky exclaims. "Well, if you ask nicely, I'm sure Arnie will be happy to have your company." I say with a laugh.
"By the way...what's happening between you and Gilbert? You've sorta seemed...distant lately." I ask, with a frown. "I don't know, I mean I was gonna tell him I like him, but I couldn't find a time, and then things got muddled up and I feel like he's ignoring me now." She says, glumly, wandering along the isles, taking a video of interest out every now and then to search the cover.
"I doubt he's ignoring you." I say honestly, knowing Gilbert. "Thanks." She says with a single laugh. "But I'm just not sure." She bites her lip, taking out Shawshank.

It's so strange to see my usually confident and outgoing best friend act so... self conscious and unsure.
As we walk up to the counter, I wonder if there's something more to it.

"Oh, can we make a quick stop at Leon's? I left my pencils there yesterday..." Becky says, with an apologetic face. "Yeah, I guess it's not too far out of the way." I say, nodding.
"Remember when you first met Leon?" Becky says. "At the beginning of the year, when things were so much simpler?" She asks, looking at her surroundings, dreamily. "I do." I giggle. "And I remember being scared shitless when I saw Jimmy." I snort. "He's a pretty scary dude." Becky agrees. "So his dad was the one responsible for Dan, eh?" Her tone of voice drops to a dull sound. "Yeah." I say, taking a deep breath. "How did you feel about that?" She asks curiously. "I knew it wasn't Jimmy's fault, but I felt sort of a quiet resentment towards him in the moment, and had flashbacks of him hurting Arnie." I say, shuddering at the thought. "In my mind, it's literally the same thing, except this time I can stop it." I say, determined. "So I did."
"By befriending the enemy?" Becky raises an eyebrow. "Well, he's not really the enemy... If you look at it, he's just a broken human being with a split family and insecurities. He can rely on his flaky mother to be there for him ever." I say, sympathising with his situation.
"You make a good point." Becky nods as we reach the Scott's front yard.
We walk up to the bright blue door and knock on it.
Leon opens it, with raised eyebrows and am unsure smile. "Hey, I'm just coming to  pick up some pencils I left here..." Becky explains. "Come in, they're in the same spot you left them." He gestures for us to come in. "Be back in a second Janie." Becky says, holding up her index finger.
I stand awkwardly, leaning against the wall in the lounge room, and Leon shoves his hands in his pockets.
"I'm really sorry." We say in unison. Then we both crack up. "I'm sorry for being such an idiot man.." I trail off. "Ah, look, I was the idiot, really." He raises his eyebrows. I laugh. "Nah, you're just the default idiot." I say, goofily. "Oh really?" He says, pretending to get mad.
"Really!" I say back.
"You should probably start running." He suggests. "Oh shit, yeah.." I say, dropping my and and racing back out the front door, scrambling down the steps as Leon comes after me.

That night, Becky, Leon, Ellen, Arnie, Gilbert and I all sit down and watch Shawshank Redemption in the lounge room.
I can finally relax again, now that I know I'm no longer hurting the people I love.

I look around the room with a smile on my face, as I lay on Arnie's chest.
But my face falls ...

Hang on, where's Amy?