-Welcome to Reality-

Chapter 12

Chapter 12: Answers

I finally found Phoenix in the photo department, I guess she needed to pick up some pictures, which she was pretty quick to stash in her purse.  I ignored her strange behavior, not really thinking much about it. It wasn't really any of my buisness anyway right?  Besides, I had too many questions flashing through my mind right now.  Answers were my first priority, and I was determined to get some flat out.  None of that "beat around the bush" crap everyone has been feeding me...

Now that we are back in my truck, away from any possible ease-droppers, I decide to pop a few questions.

"So where are we off to?"  Phoenix wonders, as she sits up straight and buckles her seat belt.  Her demeanor reminds me of Riley when we are on our way to Disneyland.  Lively and carefree.  Like her, my mind is set on a destination, but it's not at all somewhere she would have in mind.  It's very far from here... It's home.

I turn to her and plainly speak my mind.  'Phoenix, we aren't going anywhere until you start answering some questions.  I'm tired of just merely existing here, and being told to 'enjoy it.'"  I mimick her tone.  "I can't enjoy it because I don't even know to!  I know there are things you aren't telling me, so start talking!"

I can see she is taken back the sudden sterness of my demands.  "Okayyy then.  What do you need to know?"   Her eyes show hesitance, hoping I won't ask certain questions.

"Oh I don't know...." I say sarcastically.  "Let's start with why I was brought here in the first place? Orrrr why people use words like 'adjusting' or 'surviving' when they find out I'm new?  Oh and here's a winner, HOW DO I GET OUT OF HERE!?!"  With every sentence my voice raises louder and louder, Phoenix's eyes do as well.

She talks in a soft tone, "Pierce just calm down and--"

I clamp my jaw shut and roll my eyes shut....Through heavy breaths and gritted teeth,  I manage say, "Phoenix don't tell me to calm down ok?  I've lost my family, my girlfriend, and every one I've ever known.  I think have have the right to be a little perturbed right now, don't you?  You have no idea what it's like!"

For a moment she looks almost hurt by my last comment, but she quickly shakes it off.  

"Pierce, I know that you--"

I cut her off. "And if this is such a 'perfect world'"  I make quotations with my fingers, "then how can I even be angry right now?!"

"Well if you would let me get one word in then maybe I'll tell you!"

I take a deep breath and exhale.  "Go ahead."

"I've told you before, and I'll tell you again, you can only experience the full potential if you allow it, Pierce.  And right now, you aren't allowing it.  Infact you're fighting against it, and that's not going to help anything, it will just make it harder for you. You're human tendencies will automatically clash with perfection, but you have to practice and learn to master it.  And yes, that means adjusting to our ways as well."

"There you go again with this 'adjusting' crap!  I don't even know how to start!!"

"Well then figure it out Pierce, and fast.  Cause you're starting to corrupt the essence that out whole existence depends on."

"Oh so now I'm the bad guy..."

"Well you're right about one thing at least."

This is getting no where.  For some reason, Phoenix is so stuck on keeping my understanding of anything down to a minimum.  Don't I have a right to know though?  

So I try a different approach, maybe if I ask nicely she'll let some slip.

I close my eyes for a moment and get into character.  Nice boy.  I soften my tone and stretch out my hand, resting it on top of hers. 

"Phoenix, please....  It would mean so much to me if you would just tell me how to get in touch with my family.  Please...."

She yanks her hand away.  I knew the hand gig was too overdone...

"I can't."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean just that.  We aren't supposed to, alright?"

"Oh so now I'm trapped in some communist country where they dictate what you can and can't say?  That's just great...."

Silence.

"Can you take me home now?  I have to be somewhere in a half an hour."

I'm not buying the excuse, but I start the engine nonetheless.  I know that no amount of pressing, begging, or even kissing up will suck any sort of information our of her.  Honestly I'm done trying.  There's got to be another way.  I need some time to think.  I need to figure something out.  I will find answers, with or without Phoenix's help.  There has to be a loophole in this world, right?  I pray to God there is.....

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I had dropped Phoenix off at her house a couple of hours ago, and headed straight here.  I hate books and I hate reading, but for whatever crazy reason this library is always the place I will come to when I need to think about something.  Three staircases down, in the far right corner, I sit here on the floor, secluded behind rows of bookshelves.  I lean my head back on the wall and sigh,  hopeless.  I've called every single number in my phone, multiple times, and all I get is the same stupid respone: "This number is no longer in service."  I've emailed all of my contacts, but every time I recieve a mailer daemon "failed delivery" message.  When all else fails, facebook!  Wrong.  I logged on only to see that every one of my friends have been 'mysteriously' deleted, and when I tried looking them up they appear "not found."  I get this hunch that they don't want us interacting with the world much.  Ya think?!

I close my eyes and rest my forehead in my hands, out of options...defeated.  As much as I want to believe this is a dream, I know it isn't.  Dreams don't last for days.  Dreams aren't real.  And this, is as real as it gets.  Nothing is fuzzy or missing like dreams are, it's sharp and fully detailed, right down to the cobwebs in the corner and the dust particles that float through the air.  This is Reality.  

My eyes slowly peek open, still only and inch away from my wrist.  First my arms are just a blur, but after blinking a few times, black numbers come into focus.  (***) 384-2901.

Out of impulse, I take out my cell phone and dial Skylar's number.  

But by the second ring I begin to doubt myself.  Is it too soon to be calling?  Will I sound like a lunatic?  Can I even trust her?  What happens if I---

"Hellooo?"  

Even though I called to talk to her, I didn't actually expect her to pick up.  In shock, hurry and hang up.  The second I do, I want to slap myself.  Why did I hang up?!  Wow.  This is like jr. high all over again....  Since the whole calling idea didn't work out so well, I decide texting would be a better option.

Skylar:  Oh hey Pierce!  Did you just call me?

Nice going Pierce.  Real smooth.....

Me:  Yeah.... The call was lost tho... reception is really bad here.

Skylar:  I see... What's up? :)

Me:  Is it too soon to take you up on your offer??  I have a few questions...

Skylar:  Haha not at all!  Ask away! :)

Me:  Actually I was hoping we could maybe talk in person......alone...

Please tell me I did not just say that...  "Message Sent!"  I couldn't possibly have been a little more sublte?  Great first impression Pierce.

Skylar:  Oh... sure :)   When did you have in mind?

Me:  Now?

Skylar:  Just tell me where to go! :)

Me:  How's the library sound?

Skylar: Give me 5 minutes :)