Seventeen

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by Bcontesa618

by Bcontesa618

The nights on this island are so serene. You can hear all the wildlife in the back ground and it is so relaxing. We have been here now for three days and still have the rest of the week before returning to the real world.

I have decided that it is time to have a talk with Conner. So here we find ourselves just taking a stroll down the beach. Ryker found himself some babes and I am sure he is planning on misbehaving. Now Garreth and Albert have chosen a nice quiet evening indoors. Hmhm! My doubting friend seems to have fallen and fallen deep.

Conner currently has his arm around my waist and mine is currently around his but I stop walking and pull out of his arm. I turn around and look deep into his eyes. He looks at me confused and asks, "What's wrong baby?" I keep chanting this mantra in my head, I AM STRONG. I CAN DO THIS!

"I want to discuss some things that have been concerning me lately." "Have I done something wrong baby?" "No, no it's not that. I just..." I look down towards the sand we are currently standing on and he must sense my discomfort. I feel him caress my cheek as he brings my gaze back up to his.

"Ioan, you can ask me anything. Anything at all. Nothing is off the table. Okay!" The smile he sends me is just what I needed to give me the courage to move forward. "Okay!" I smile back at him timidly. I take a deep breath in an attempt to stall this conversation as I gather my wits.

"I want to talk about the way you have been treating me." He gives me a confused look but asks, "What do you mean? Have I done something you did not like?" Now I have made him worry and this was not my intent. Looking straight into his eyes I respond, "I know that right now it's difficult for you to comprehend this but Conner, ever since that NIGHT, YOU have been treating me like I'm fragile. Like I am going to shatter at any moment and I know that right now you don't trust me..."

He kisses me deeply effectively shutting me up and after a couple of minutes I find myself calmed down. He gathers me in his arms and says, "It's not that I don't trust you. I do." He pulls me away from him so he can look into my eyes and says, "There is no one else that I trust more than you baby. I'm just scared. I can't loose you in any way ever. I won't survive Ioan and I am sorry if I made you feel this way."

"So why have we not gone all the way? Don't you want to? Is it me? Is it that I am a guy?" "God NO baby. No way! I love every inch of you and you have no idea what kind of restraint I have had to wield being with you, around you especially when we are alone. Never doubt that I want you baby because I do. My heart wants you!" He kisses each of my eyes. "My soul wants you!" He kisses the tip of my nose. "My body definitely wants you!" He melds said body to mine and then kisses the breath right out me.

I am barely holding on but eventually we come up for air and Conner says, "In all honesty Ioan, I just wanted to give you time. Time to adjust to all of the changes in your life. Time to adjust to us being together and getting to know each other on an intimate level. Time baby...that is what I was giving you and I am so sorry that I gave you the wrong impression but let me be clear so there is no misunderstanding on either of our parts. Are you trying to tell me that you are ready to further our relationship?"

I lift my hand to his face and caress the side of it. I love touching him because his skin looks like marble but feels like silk. He closes his eyes and just hmmm his appreciation. Then I move up to his ear and whisper, "Yes! I am so ready to take the next step." When he opens his eyes the look of pure unadulterated lust he gives me makes my member weep.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++

You would think that night we would have made love on the beach but NO. Conner has other plans. Another two days has gone by and nothing. I know he is plotting and planning but this is ridiculous. Do I have to seduce Conner to get him to give me some? How would I even begin to do that?

Most of the time I feel so damn inadequate when it comes to matters of the heart. I have this self doubt deeply rooted into my subconscious and sometimes it is very difficult not to listen to that poisonous voice.

I am not even sure just how long I spent in my self induced trance. All I know is that I am suddenly brought to the present by the clearing of Conner's throat as he attempts to gain my attention. He is kneeling in front of me with a very troubled look on his face.

"Baby, everything okay in there?" He asks me as he caresses the side of my face. It never fails. Every time I begin to mentally despair, his touch brings a sense of peace and love and I have to remind myself that this man is mine and nothing and no one can change that.

I smile brightly at him in order to reassure him that I am indeed okay and say, "I'm okay. Just got a bit lost in my head that's all. I don't want you to worry because I am fine now okay!" His return smile let's me know that yes he indeed understands.

As he gets back up he says to me, "Come on baby. We need to get ready." This is news to me so I ask, "Where are we going?" "You just wait and see okay!" I nod in understanding and follow him inside to prepare for whatever it is Conner has in store for us.