Fading Away(A Hiroki & Takahiro Moriuchi Fanfic) *Complete*

Chapter 8

Hiro's POV 

Decisions are the hardest thing  to make especially when it's a choice between where you want to be, and where you need to be.. and right now I need to be with Lex, but the tour is on hanging on it's last thread, and if I leave it could mean the end of My First Story. The end of the money I have coming in,  but there always has to come a moment in your life when you have to make a life changing decision.. 

I sit in the tour bus in the dark with my head in my hands... torn.. My heart need to go to Lex, but my brain is telling me that if I leave now I wont be able to support her, and the baby.. 

The baby... I am a father... I let this astonishing  feeling consume me in a second a pure happiness, but just as soon as it come reality starts to throw the facts in my face letting the  fear starts to sink in. 

This is the best yet most frightening news I have ever heard in my life, and honestly.. I am scared.. I'm so scared the fears has me shaking.. 

I want my baby to be healthy, and alive, but Lex has a high risk of dying in the process which could take the baby if things go wrong... I could loose the two most important things in my life... Funny.... I don't even know the baby yet, but knowing it is mine, and a part of us both living inside the love of my life makes the urge to protect him or her strong. 

My eyes are burning from all the tears, but at least on the bright side I don't think I can cry any more.

Numbness is consuming. I don't know how this should be handled, or if what I want to do is whats best.. Even if it is.. what could I be loosing in the process of trying to do whats best?

I go against my brain, and text Taka. 

Me: Taka, can I ask you for a favor?

Taka: What the hell? you just leave her hanging like that? This better be good cause I have half a mind to fly out there and kick your little ass for this. I hope you know she refuses to eat anything, and wont move from the spot she was in when you hung up. 

I feel another piece of my heart fall imagining her laying there with her eyes all swollen and puffy all broken because of me.. The love of my life is hurting because of me. 

Me: I need you to be able to take care of Lex until I can get this tour done and over with. I can;t come home no matter how badly I want to or I will not have any income to support her and the baby. I know she will make it, she is strong. . 

Taka: Your not coming back? Your leaving her for another 3 months? What if she goes into premature labor? Then what are you going to do Hiro?

Tears fall onto the screen of my phone, what do you know I can cry more... 

Me: I know all the risks, but if I don't have any money to support then what am I?

Taka: You are her rock, that's what you are. She needs you not for money, but for your mental, and physical support. 

Me: Your not fucking helping, If I leave now I will have no income at all. I will loose My First Story! Now will you please just fucking help me out so I can do right by her?

Taka: Whatever man, sure. 

Me: Thank you. 

I turn off my phone and chunk it across the bus with all my force shouting as it flies and hits the back wall and shatters. 

I fall to my knees and grab chunks of my hair and scream again "FFFFFUUUUUCCCKKK!!!!!!" 

Out of all the thing I thought my brother would be understanding... 

I mean what would he do if he was in my situation, and was on the verge of loosing One Ok Rock? Maybe he would just risk it all and be with her, but when the time come and he has to pay all these bills, and keep food on the table without any money then what? 

Yeah, he losses his house, he loses everything he owns so the government can get the money the demand. 

I am loosing my fucking mind not know how to handle this, but I feel like it should be the way to go no matter how much this is tearing me in two. 

I slowly get up from the floor and try to gain my balance before I  go and grab my busted phone and try it to see if it works. 

I flash of releif  flows through me when the screen lights up. I give it a quick kiss, and call Lex. 

Lexi's POV

"Lex you need to eat something, or the baby will be weak.." Taka says as he walks into the room with a tray of different foods, worry written all over his face. 

"I'm fine, I'm not even hungry. If I do get hungry I will eat.. " I turn the other way and cover my head with the blankets "Will you shut the blinds please? It's too bright..." 

I hear him sigh and walk to shut the blinds setting the tray down on my bed sit before he sits and rubs my back. 

"Lex, you haven't eaten anything since yesterday, I know you must be hungry. You just need to will yourself to.. Please Lex.. for the baby..." 

I feel my heart drop hearing how broken his voice sounds. I'm hurting him. I can't loose him too.... 

I slowly motivate myself to remove the blankets and sit up looking at his face. Taka has dark circles under his eye which are blood shot. 

"Taka... have you slept at all..?" I caress his face and make him look at me with his sad worn out eyes. 

"Yeah, well.. between when I got up to check on you I did.." 

I feel my chest tighten, I know Taka cares about me, but if caring about me is making him like this I need him to stop.. 

"Lay down..." I move my self up more, and gesture beside me for him to lay. 

"I will eat if you sleep.."  I try to look reassuring, but behind my puffy eyes I am sure it didn't look so reassuring... 

He is hesitant, but soon gives "Fine, but please  eat it all..." I nod my head as he lays his down and soon falls asleep... 

I silently get up as my phone starts to vibrate, seeing Hiros name and face light up my screen i feel butterflies flutter in my chest, but with them there is a slight fear of what he is going to say....  I cover Takas  body with a blanket before grabbing my phone and walking out of the room. 

Completely forgetting my promise to eat if he sleeps. The only thing that is occupying my brain is that the love of my life is on the other end of this phone. 

"Hello?" I try to cover up the shaking in my voice, but stop just as I  hear him sniffling on the other end making my heart drop "L-love whats wrong?" I feel as if darkness has gathered around me and I have no way out. 

I start to worry when he doesn't answer "Hiro, please... your scaring me.." Tears star to form in the edges of my eyes thinking of the worst things possible that could have happened... While I let my brain get the best of me. 

What if all of this was too much, and he drank way over his limit... making himself not able to think straight,  causing him to do something bad... he does have a suicidal past... Memories of the scars that travel up and down his arms form stomach twisting images in my brain...  Panic starts to scare me so I quickly grab my keys and rush towards to door needing to get to him as fast as I possibly can. "Hiro.. please..." 

I and half to to the door when a small whisper makes me come to a complete stop. 

"I'm s-sorry love.." I hear him finally say causing me to come to a stop and slide down to the floor as tears stream down my face in between sobs.