If You're Not The One - ZeRoyalMexican

Serious Talks

Ze's POV- The next day

"I think I need to tell Max what happened the other night Chilled..."

He automatically lifts his head from his laptop, pressing his lips together. "I thought you would of told him last night to be honest..."

"He kept asking if you remembered anything and how you was after he left but I would of blurted it out if I spoke about it. I don't want him to think he has to worry about us doing it again." I sigh.

He shuts the lid down on the laptop and sits himself up. Okay so we're gonna figure this all out now. I can do that. We can talk about this, it's not like this is awkward or anything. Well it is but it isn't...

"So he kept asking about what we talked about?"

"Yes. I had to keep throwing myself at him so I wouldn't accidentally blurt it out. It was the only way to stop him from asking."

"Throwing yourself?" he questions.

I feel like I'm dealing with an idiot sometimes.

"Sex, Chilled. Sex..." I shouted.

"Oh, uhhh..." he starts to mutter. "Oh... Wait, all night?"

"And all this morning... I'm so fucking sore man. You see the way I'm sitting?! I can't sit properly right now, the only comfy way is on my back..."

He tries to hold back his laughter as I whinge out.

"Don't laugh at me! I had no choice! After the second time we just made out until he got an erection again and stupid me climbs back on top of him... This is karma. My body is paying the price for one little kiss..."

"Well you can tell him if you want. It was just a stupid kiss anyway. He might even forgive you since it was me who kissed you. You know the one with no memory and all." he explained.

I slowly rub my eyes and try not to think about that kiss again. It was a stupid kiss... but I still kissed him back. This is just as much my fault. Why did I even kiss him back?

"I kissed you back though, that's the thing... I can't blame you for this."

"Not to try and make this even more awkward but why did you kiss me back?" he inquired.

The question goes in and out of my head. Do I still have feelings for him? Do I like both him and Max? The thought of knowing there was no one he was pining after is seeming like the most plausible reason. It sort of makes sense but is it just that or do I actually still feel something. I still think he's the best guy I've ever met but I feel that way about Max too.

"I don't know, it just reminded me of that night and I went with it. It was just you and me again. It's all I wanted and I got it. It was great, we were great but it didn't last long. You broke it off with me after you realised you wanted Adam but it was a good thing because Max helped me get back on track."

"Is that when you started to like him?" he questioned.

The moment where it started to happen. The night we sent Adam to Chilled's house after our little Harry Potter marathon. He was just so nice to me and caring about everything. That's when I got the little tingly feeling. It was just a little crush first but it started to grow over the time.  Was it really that long ago now? It seems like it was. I don't even know how long exactly it's been since that night. Almost four months I think? I tell Chilled the whole story of myself and Max's journey. He was supposedly straight while I was one hundred percent falling for him every time we hung out. He had no idea until he walked in on me acknowledging my feelings for him. I'm still amazed that we're together now, it was a rough start. Now I just feel like I have just ruined things. Am I willing to lose him over this stupid kiss or do I keep it between me and Chilled?