Afraid To Fall

Chapter Fifteen

"Harry, everything is fine," I told him, sighing deeply. "Tell me." 

"Why are you being so stubborn?" 

"Me? Being Stubborn?"

"Yes you!"

"Elizabeth, tell me what you were thinking!" he begged. "I don't want to!" His jaw tensed as he let go of my hand. "Tell me," he said. I just dropped my head to the floor. "No," I whispered. He began pacing, mumbling things under his breath. 

"Am I not trustworthy?" he asked angrily, crossing his strong arms over his chest. "It's not that Ha-" "Then what the hell is it!?" I flinched and shook my head. "You wouldn't understand," I mumbled. "Then help me understand, Elizabeth. I want to help you," he said softly, taking both of my hands in his once more. 

He's lying.. Don't trust him..

"You can't help, Ha-" "Fucking hell. I'm done," he shouted, dropping my hands. He began backing away, shaking his head, "I tried. I tried to help you. Thanks for not cooperating." My jaw dropped as he turned around and walked towards the door. Tears welled up in my eyes as my thoughts ran wild. "I hate you!" I screamed. He turned and looked at me, leaning against the big double door. "Ii never want to see you again, Harry! You ruined my life!" The tears were flooding over my cheeks like a waterfall as I shouted those words at the top of my lungs. 

He stood there staring at me. "Go the hell away! Get out of my life!" I continued, wiping the tears away roughly. Once he opened the door, he stumbled out, looking down at the ground. I should've listened to myself.. 

He never cared.. 

He was using you, Elizabeth.

He just wanted in your pants like Zayn did.

This is why you shouldn't wear your dumb broken heart on your sleeve.

I tugged at my hair as the voices kept telling me how stupid I am. The tears fought their way out as I ran to the bathroom. My vision was blurred and my throat was burning. The feeling I get..the urge I have to cut came quickly. I burned at my stomach painfully. I could hear it's pleas..

Get a blade, Elizabeth.. 

You're not worth it, Elizabeth..

Cut, Elizabeth..

"Shut up!" I screamed, dropping to my knees. I buried my face into the sleeves of my long sleeved shirt and crawled towards the back wall. My head began throbbing from all of the pressure my tears put on it. The quiet sobs were getting more violent as I searched through my small bag. The razor glinted in the dim sunlight the bathroom applied as I held it up in the air in front of me. 

Do it, Elizabeth..

You deserve it, Elizabeth..

Just one..or two..or more..

I slowly glided the sharp object above the recent wounds and whimpered in pain. The stinging began to put my mind at ease until it began talking to me again..

Try your throat..

I gulped and held the blood blade up to my neck. Maybe this is stupid, but I want it. 

Do it. 

Do it.

Do it.

"Do it," my mind chanted. I gulped softly before pressing it against my neck. "I love you," I whispered before slowly sliding it across. I felt my throat sting as a warm liquid ran down and into my shirt. My eyes were staring to get blurry when I heard a slam and a shrill scream. My lips curled into a smile as black blotches filled my vision. 

I did it.. I finally did it. Before my eyes completely blacked out, I saw the school nurse standing before me. "Elizabeth, just keep breathing!" she begged me. I only shook my head and smiled at her. "I'm finally done," I whispered happily. "Done.." That's when my world stopped. I saw the bright light, making my heart leap for joy. I'm gone..