Cruel Reality [B1A4 Fanfic]

The Dullness

Jaesook's POV

Shit. Shit, shit, SHIT!

What the fuck's wrong with me?!

I shook my head as I pulled up my hood that had apparently fallen on my nape without me noticing.

I swiftly made my way out of the hospital with a fake watcher's ID and went back to my apartment.

My mind swirled with unwanted thoughts as I laid on the floor. The cold seeping through my shirt somehow relaxed me.

I was thinking of her again.

Ever since I saved the kid, I've felt so protective of her. I felt calm and comfortable thinking of her or even just seeing her.

I hate it. I fucking hate this. I messed my hair as I stood up and grabbed a bottle of alcohol from the fridge. I haven't had the chance to enjoy a drink since she was admitted. I'd been busy steering the gang from her, stirring fights or arranging club parties for them to be busy with.

How pathetic.
I thought to myself as I slugged a drink. The alcohol going down my throat giving me good feeling. My mind wandered to what she asked me earlier.

"And why are you helping me again?"

She asked that with her eyes shining with curiosity and obliviousness, as if it was a mystery she badly wanted to solve. She looked so adorable.

I don't know. I took a long drink again. I don't fucking know!

Crashes of glass shattering jolted me back to reality. I had unconciously thrown the bottle onto the wall while still holding onto it, effectively cutting my hand.

I tsked in annoyance and let what's left of the bottle crash loudly onto the ground.

Jung Cj, what the fuck did you do to me?!

***

Julie's POV

"Goodmorning, Sujeong." CEO-nim was looking at me when I opened my eyes. I jumped back in surprise. Wrong move. I yelped aloud even before I felt the excruciating pain, knowing all too well that my stitches might be bleeding. Or worse opened.

I heard the buzz of the emergency button and looked up to see CEO-nim standing looking worried.

"Are you okay?"

Do I freaking look okay?!

I wanted to scream but I couldn't. I felt good for a second when I felt angry. Being emotionless, I had felt dull. Feeling something passionate other than anxiety and panic made me giddy.

Wait, that sounded wrong.

I groaned in pain as several footsteps came in from the door. I couldn't quite catch what they were saying, but they were annoyingly noisy which made my headache worse. I felt a needle slid onto my arm and the next thing I know I was lying on my back on the hospital bed, fluttering my eyes open.

The amount of anesthesia they injected onto me must've been enough to make me blackout and wake up with no memories or any feeling of the pain.

"Sujeong?" Eonni sincerely sounded worried, which worried me more. Did my stitch open or what?!

"I'm sorry for surprising you." CEO-nim apologized. You don't say. I felt the urge to roll my eyes but didn't.

It wasn't everyday that your company's CEO have any time to visit you so early. Eonni inquired me of his visit, I was just surprised to see him so early in the morning. Surely he has better things to do than visit me, right?

"It's fine, sir." I tried to sit up but the medicine was still in effect, so I just sat back onto the rolled up bed. It was pretty disrespectful but I didn't have any choice.

We just talked about my hiatus in the music industry and what to officially say about this incident. We decided that I apparently just had an accidental fall at school. It sounded lame to me, but through the media, the netizens would believe anything.

He scolded me a lot and said how disappointed he was that I was not careful. I took it all without a word. I couldn't say nor even think anything because as usual, I wasn't feeling anything. Except a pinch of guilt, because I felt nothing throughout his whole speech, which he exerted effort in, mind you.

He eventually left and then it was Eunha eonni next to scold me. Of course I had to act like I really cared about what they were saying, I really wanted to, but still... nothing.

Once I was alone, I got my phone and dialled Park Jisha's number. My finger hovered over the call button. On second thought, maybe I won't..?

I was deciding this when Hyungdon came with the twins. I almost dropped my phone thinking it was eonni. I gave the best smile I could muster and embraced the squealing kids.

They were frantically asking me questions from asking if I was okay, to what I felt during the surgery, which of course I wasn't awake to know.

I didn't feel a thing the whole day. I felt empty. I felt dull. Just like that day. Those days.

I sighed and let sleep take over my soulless mind.

__________

Dedicated to ImPerfectMistake1357. My poor sis who just lost her account :( Your drafts were marvelous, I'm sure you can make better. Hwaiting~

~PerfectMistake1357♡