Kleo: Ending together

Chapter 8

"Ned we need to talk" I said nervously.

Ned sat up and put his phone on the nigh stand.

"What Kate?"

"Okay I don't really know where to start but.. I feel like we are growing apart. We hardly do anything together and you are always drinking. I have asked you many times to stop drinking and you always promise but then you brake that promise. And I just can't go through this again. And I do not..."

"Kate just stop" Ned interrupted.

"No Ned let me finish.
I do not want my children, our children to go trough the same as I went through with my mom. I mean do you still love me?"

Ned was really sad but awkward at the same time.

"Kate it's not that I don't love you or anything it's just.."

"Just what ?" I found a tear slide down my cheek. But I wiped it off quickly.

"It's just not the life I want to live."

I couldn't say anything. I just broke down.

"this isn't the life you want to life?!" I said and raised my tone.

before he could say anything I interrupted.

"Are you really ready to give up on this ?What about Bear? What about me?"

"Kate you don't understand how I feel! I always feel like I have to behave and be a good role model and always do this and that, you are controlling me and I'm not going to let you get away with it anymore."

Ned stood up, took up his phone and walked straight to the door but I blocked him.

"You are not leaving, we have to talk! You can't keep running away from our problems. YOUR problems."

I was so frustrated. I wanted to walk out and disappear but that was not an option.

I took a deep breath and asked Ned.

"what should we do then?"

I saw he was nervous but he answered with the only word I never wanted to hear him say.

"Divorce. I think we should get a divorce."

I felt the whole word spin and I couldn't think about anything.

I never thought he would say that, I thought we were happy. We used to be.
I'm so scared. What will I say to my parents? What will I say to my kids? They will be devastated.

I need to sit down.

I sat down on the edge of the bed and Ned sat down right next to me.
He took my hand. Please let go of me.
I tried saying something but no words came out.

"kate, this is also hard for me you know."

Yeah sure.

"Can you say something?" Ned squeezed my hand.

What can I say?

"Kate?.."

"Let go of me." I said looking at the wall.

"Kate, please don't act like this."

I stood up so fast that he had to let go of my hand.

"I Love you. and I thought you loved me."

"Of course I love you! I have done so much for you!."

"But then why do you want divorce?"

"Kate you don't fucking understand!"

Wow he was really angry.

"What don't I understand?"

"I love you but I'm tired of you and your shit."

There he stepped over the line.

"Ned lets just stop fighting. We can work this out right?" I said calmly.

"I don't want to work this out. I want out of this marriage."

At that moment I kinda gave up.

"Fine" I sight

"I'm going to stay at a friends house for a couple of days and when we have both calmed down we will talk about this." 

"Okay"

Ned walked out and closed the door quietly. 
I laid down and started crying.

For about ten minutes I just laid there and tears kept running down my cheeks but I knew I had to stop thinking about this.

I got up and walked into the bathroom and looked in the mirror. Gross
My mascara was all over my face and my eyes were more red then a tomato.
I washed my face with cold water and took a deep breath.

The kids don't need more stress so I ain't going to tell them this yet.
Maybe I'll just go to my parents and stay there for a few days. To think.

But then my mom will start asking stupid questions and I can't deal with that right now.

So what if I just stay home and spend some time with my kids.
That sound great.

I walked out of the bathroom and down the stairs.

I could hear that they were watching a movie so I walked into the "movie room" as the kids call it.

"What movie are you watching?" I asked

"FROZEN" Bear yelled happy

"Haha oh I have never watched that..."
As soon as I let go of the last word the kids all looked at me gasping.

"You have seriously never watched frozen?" Mia asked.

"Nope but never too late?" I replied.

That night we stayed in and just cuddled up and watched Frozen.