ill wait

i dont know...

I finally made it through the day without any embarassing moments, and a surisingly pleasant visit at lunch from joslyn. i was mostly excited and suprised that she had started talking to me and i couldnt get enough. it was like that butterfly sensation, though i had a few other sensations too. but all through the day i couldnt help but notice that tyler was acting strange and i had decided to figure out after school.
i pulled in his driveway and shut off the car. i took a deep breath. im not sure why but i was nervous. i walked up to the door and knocked. Ty came down the stairs and opened the door, his expression puzzled.
"w-whats up. ya wanna sit down or something?"
i nodded, stepped inside and followed him upstairs to his room
he closed the door and looked at me the way he looks at me when he did something stupid like wreck my car or sleep with my giirlfreind. but this was different. his eyes didnt look worried, they looke scared.
"dude whats wrong? i know theres something going on."
he looked at his shoes and a tear dropped to the ground.
"I um...i need to tell you something and then i want to ask you something...but i-i dont know how you will react"
he looked up, eyes full of tears. i put my hand on his shoulder and nodded.
"its okay ty, you can tell me anything."
he bit his lip like he was going to punch something and closed his eyes.
"its a bit more complicated than that...you see um..i think-no, i-i know im um-" his voice shakily trailed off, tears rolling down his cheeks.
"ty-"
"im gay."
i was stunned. i had never expected this. he was one of the biggest flirts i knew...i guess he has a different audience now.
"okay...it'll be fine, im okay with it"
"then why do you look like i ran over your dog?"
i looked up and closed my dropped jaw.
"i..i just wasnt really expecting it."
"yeah me neither. but there was something i wanted to ask you...though i already know the answer...unless i just dont know you at all"
"just ask me."
he paused for a long time, like he was making a life choice. he closed his eyes and let out a big breath. my heart pounded, so many thoughts and possibilities of what he might say next raced through my head quicker than a 4 lane highway. He looked around the room, then finally focused his eyes on me.
"will you go out with me?"
holy shit. "uh-ty i..i dont know. ive been having doubts but- i just dont know."
he looked down again and gritted his teeth, shaking his head. I think he had been expecting this but it still hurt him.
he never looked up, and i dont think he even blinked, but a tear rolled down his cheek and nodded.
"maybe i should go" i got up and walked out the door, not turning back and thinking about what had just happened. i waved to his mom as i walked outside and tripped on their garden hose. of course.