Lost in you(Lesbian Story girlxgirl) slowly editing

Chapter 14

Guys I changed the chapter 13. I'm trying update every chapter so it makes sense and it's longer. I just don't want it to be too dramatic either, I'm trying to make my way into Leo's and Victoria's relationship but before I do, I want you guys to know her background life in order to  enjoy their relationship throughout the whole drama that is Leo's life. Sorry for the very LATE updates and chapter.

"I'm sorry Mathew." I sigh, regretting my move on him. I was so embarrassed. "I'm so fucking messed up."

"Leo I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry for all this." He leans closer to me, wrapping one arm around my neck and nuzzling his nose close to my ear. He smells amazing.

"It's not your fault. This is wrong though." I giggle, letting comfort sink in while I inhaled his scent.

"I am a bad man. I am not worthy of you and you know it, I just want to be able to have you around as a friend." He sighs, breaking into a pool of tears on my bed. I stand up and place my hand on his hair, giving it small pleasures as he tried to breath. " I know how fucked up I am, I know it's not the best time but damn! I'm bad."

"Fuck!" I take the sleeves of my shirt and wipe away the small tear that prickled down my cheek. "You're making me cry now."

"No, no, no! Don't cry!" He sits on the bed and hugs me, "that's not my intention. I love you."

" I love you too but what you did to me hurts alot. It still hurts." I admit my feelings to him. For the first time in months I told him my true feelings towards him, I am content right now. I miss the happy and honest side of him, I miss how we both had closure and would tell each other everything. I need to tell him all that's in my head. " I still think on the day you slept over for the first time without mom noticing, that night was amazing." I giggles again, sobs along with it.

"I remember too." He smiles.

Memories:

"Climb the tree, I'll open the window for you." I hung up the phone and lock my door. I hurry myself towards the glass window and open it, smiling widely and waving him to come in. Mathew wore black jeans, a white polo and toms. As he climbs the tree, I check my appearance on the mirror and brush my hair a little, fixing my lipstick and liner.

"I'm in!" Mathew whispers.

"Hehe, come here." I lean into his arms, kissing his cheek and led him to my bed.

"You're room is so girly." He teases, "how come you have a picture of Joe Jonas and not me?"

"Joe is hot and you're not, end of story." I smile again, squeezing him against me.

"Fair enough." We both sit down on the bed, gazing at each other's eyes. " I have something very important to tell you but please, don't freak out."

My eyes widen, is he cheating on me?! "Now I am freaking out."

"Hm. Here it.goes." he takes a deep breath and closes his eyes, " I love you."

"What?"

"What?!"

"Did you say...you loved me?"

"No? Yes... I dont know."

I wrap my arms around his neck and jump untop of him, kissing his lips. "I love you Mathew."

====

"That's the first time I said I loved you ." he smiles.

"Did you mean it?"

"...I-um... I don't know." I pull myself off his side and sit on the bedside. I knew he didn't love me and I was okay with it? I wasn't, but the thought of Mathew pretending to love me still stings. The thought of him wanting someone else holding him instead of me still fucking hurts.

"Please don't be mad Leo.Please just-" I cut him off,

"This never meant anything,okay? And it's not a gateway for forgiveness. I just needed a distraction and you were there." I smile, and frown at the same time. I can't hold in anything anymore. I am completely shattered as this day continues to go, all I need is to get lost for months and forget my name. My existence. My heartbreaks. Problems.

"Okay..."

"Plus, I'm sort of in love with someone else. Her name is Victoria." I say, not meaning the first few words that came from my mouth.

"Her?" Mathew turns to me, and looks me in the eye. Full of curiosity and furry, "you- you like girls now?!"

"Not girls just this one."

"But- but you gave me so much shit for being with someone else and now... you have a girlfriend?"

"Is that so hard to believe Mathew? After so many heart breaks you tend to go the other way so... I went the other way?" I'm beyond humiliated, I don't know why I am, maybe because I confessed that I was dating a girl or because I thought he hated me being with someone else that wasn't him. Either way, I was embarrassed. Why didn't I get with a guy instead? "What now, are you homophobic?"

He gasps and pushes himself away from me, offended "Homophobic? No Leo! This isn't about me not liking you with girls, it's about you getting in another relationship to get back at me. I know how you are and you aren't so clever when it comes to that!"

"What?!" I slap his face, twice and stand up from my bed. "How dare you say that about me? You did the same when it came to that slut and the worse part is knowing I was your second choice!"

He stands as well, nose to nose. Eyes flaring and his breath bated, "don't you dare call her that ever again!"

"Or what? Are you going to hit me?!"

Slap.

"I'm- I'm so sorry Leo I- I don't know what happene-"

"Get out." With my hand against my cheek, I point to the door. "Now."

"Leo please listen to me!"

"No! You know what? I've spent these past few weeks dwelling on our relationship that I ignored how bad of a boyfriend you were. I'm dumb enough to believe we could have been friends. Should have known it would end in disaster, nothing has a fairy tale ending when it comes to you!"

Mathew carries out of the room, ashamed and scared. Why is it that all bad things happen to little ol' Leo?