Break My Heart a Thousand Times (The Selection Series Story)

Chapter XV: Look at the Stars, Look How They Shine for You;

Chapter Fifteen

"America!" I turned to see Chelsey, recognizable by her dress, grinning hugely at me, dancing. Her eyes were shining under her mask, and her hair was a little rumpled from dancing, but she looked really excited to see me.

"Have you seen Maxon yet?" she asked as a different song, this time a little slower, came on. I took my mask off so we could talk, but my mask only covered the top part of my face anyway, so I would've been able to talk even without it on.

I shook my head as she came closer, slightly worried. It had already been an hour, and I hadn't seen or spoken to Maxon at all the entire time. I knew he was busy, and I had still enjoyed talking to my friends and meeting new people, but I was slightly worried. If I didn't talk to him soon, the whole plan to get us together wouldn't even commence, much less actually work.

Chelsey shrugged. "Yeah, I only saw him once. I mentioned 'you'," she put quotation marks around 'you', "a couple of times. Since you're Veronikka's guest'," Chelsey winked, "he said he would love to meet you."

I brightened. "Really? Then why haven't I seen him?"

Chelsey rolled her eyes playfully. "America, you may look stunning and gorgeous, but this party is huge!" She stared in wonder for a second. She, like me, wasn't very accustomed to wealth. "But put your mask on, okay? He'll eventually realize it's you, but..." A mischievous look lit Chelsey's face. "I want to see how he reacts when it happens."

I nodded, adjusting my mask, and Chelsey waved a quick goodbye, seeing someone she knew.

For a second I just stood, gently swaying to the soft music. Many couples were now slow-dancing on the dance floor, and I slightly yearned to be there with them, preferably in the arms of Aspen... wait, no, Maxon. I meant Maxon, I corrected myself.

I panicked at my mistake, even though I had only thought about it. I was supposed to be attracted by Maxon... but I still loved and missed Aspen. The last few days I had been so focused on the ball and Maxon that Aspen hadn't really crossed my mind. The thought made me feel slightly guilty, imagining what he would think. How could I be falling in love again so quickly? I asked myself, shocked and slightly ashamed.

And why? Part of myself added, my heart starting to fill with doubt as the music picked up and couples twirled and spun around the dance floor. Dresses and ballgowns brushed and twirled, light smiles were shown, and everyone stepped joyfully and delicately as they danced, but I was starting to feel sick. Now that I had thought of it, Maxon and Aspen were not very alike at all. While Maxon was careful and cautious, Aspen was wild and daring. When Aspen was passionate and bold, Maxon was polite and courteous. Although Maxon was sweet, caring, kind, and funny, just thinking about Aspen started making me feel passionate again... I felt in love again.

Sighing, I closed my eyes. Should I even be here anymore? Dancing with Maxon had lost much of its appeal, and I was really reconsidering if I wanted to try to get together with him in the first place. I cared for him, of course, but maybe my friends had been the ones to wrap me up into this.

My eyes searched through the crowds, spotting Keahna and Chelsey dancing with guards, and Valleree and Veronikka smiling and talking near a refreshments table.

Valleree waved to Veronikka as she meshed into the crowd, cracking somewhat corny jokes to a guard and then refusing to link arms when he offered to because she looked embarrassed. Veronikka giggled and came over to hug a somewhat tall guard, smiling and laughing. Was the only reason I had agreed to their idea was because I was desperate for love again? How could I know what I wanted when I cared so much for everyone else? Was Maxon really my next love, or just a small attraction, based purely on my memories and longing for Aspen?