Lust or Love?

Chapter 3

The bright sunlight bursted through the bedroom window, and the familiar musky smell of Beau lingered as I rolled over and found him snoring away, barely covered by the thin bed sheet. It was scary how godly he looked. I sat there for a moment, mesmerized by his beauty. How could someone possibly look as perfect as he did at this moment?

And then it hit me--why do I even care that he looks so gorgeous? Yes he's attractive, but we already hooked up last night. I got all I wanted, right? It was then that I realized the devastating truth of the situation. I wasn't over this. I wasn't over him. I wasn't ready to get up and leave, pretending like this one night stand didn't completely change the way I feel about him. Because the truth of the situation was--as tough as it was to accept--that it most certainly did completely change the way I feel about him.

And the next thing that set in: panic. I was devastated. If I ever had any chance with Beau, it was definitely gone now. It flew right out the window the moment I agreed to leave that party with him last night, which in other words was his formal invitation of asking me to have sex. And I did! Why oh why did I have to develop feelings for him after we had sex!

Flashbacks from last night flooded into my mind; bits and pieces of the sloppy sex session crammed into my memory. I cringed. How could I have been so whorey! I had barely spoken to the guy and I just suddenly oblige to giving him head and granting entrance to my vagina? Clearly I am in dire need of some serious self-improvement.

I glanced at Beau again. Still soundly asleep. Perhaps I should just leave... After all, this is his house not mine, and if his family were to realize I just slept with Beau... Well, I don't want to make it awkward. He's probably expecting me to be gone when he wakes anyways. I slid out of bed and rushed to find my clothes scattered about the floor; that is, except for my skirt which I tidily folded on the dresser last night. How could I be so drunk, and yet still have managed to properly fold a skirt in the midst of our hookup?

That's it! I was drunk! No wonder I can't make out half of what actually went down last night! And that's it--that'll be my saving grace--the fact that I was drunk! I can tell Beau the only reason I agreed to hookup was because I was so intoxicated. It may be a weak reason, but it's better than nothing. Perhaps I do still have a chance, a chance to have a real relationship with the boy I'm suddenly and yet totally crushing over.

One problem, Evelyn. You don't even know if be likes you back. Right, I'm almost positive he has no feelings towards me at all. Beau Brooks is a player. I racked my brain for the last time he had an actual girlfriend, but my mind was blank. Well, I suppose that takes care of that. I'll just pretend like this never happened, and move on with my life now that I'm certain I have no possibility of a relationship with him.

I finished dressing myself and proceeded to grabbed my phone from his dresser, when a husky voice called me from behind. "Oi, Evelyn. Going somewhere?" I turned around to find him wide awake and sitting up, staring at me with that cheeky smirk.

I froze where I stood. "I-er-you were asleep just a minute ago!"

He chuckled. "When you rolled out of bed it woke me. I watched you get dressed. Looks to me as if you were about to ditch me..." His eyes questioned me. "Were you?"

"I-well-I figured you would want me to leave," I started. "Isn't that what all guys want the morning after? They want the girl to leave."

His faced dropped to a pout, and he let out a deep sigh. "Evelyn, you made me a very happy man last night," he winked as he emphasized the word 'very'. "Why on earth would I demand you to leave first thing the next morning? Besides, you're not just 'some girl'." He mumbled the last part so quietly I barely caught it.

I smiled. "Well, if I don't have to leave so suddenly, how about I make us some breakfast?" I set my phone back on the dresser and danced to the kitchen, giving Beau some privacy to get dressed. I then realized I was wearing the same clothes I went partying in last night: a tight, busty skirt to accompany my tight pencil skirt.

"Beau, you think I can borrow some sweats and a tee?" I asked as I walked back into his room. His muscular, tan body pulling on a tee himself as I barged in.

"Sure," he winked and tossed the smallest sweats and tee he had in my direction. I went into Luke's room next door just to change in privacy. I breathed in the scent on his clothes while putting them on; the heavenly aroma that only Beau had. I went back out into the kitchen to inspect what ingredients I'd be working with.

"You look damn good in my clothes," he licked his top lip while coming to join me in the kitchen.

I stuck my tongue out, "Better than you I reckon."

"I'm okay with that," he laughed as his hand snaked around my waist. "Not many girls can pull off the club look and a pair of comfy sweats."

"What can I say, I look fabulous in anything," I giggled as I grabbed the pancake mix.

"You look especially fabulous with nothing on," he responded and kissed the top of my head.

I gave him a venomous stare. "I was drunk last night. It doesn't count if I'm intoxicated and you take advantage of me."

"Me, take advantage of you?" He looked astonished. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but you seemed to be much more in control of me as a matter of fact," he smirked.

I would correct him, if only I had a substantial memory to do so. "Well," I began. "Let's just forget that ever happened. I don't want your impression of me being that I'm a whore who hooks up with men on demand." I stared at the pan as I spoke the last sentence.

"Evelyn, I know you're not," he lifted my chin up to look him in the eyes. "You're very special to me. I realize what happened last night was probably a bad way to start out whatever relationship we'll have in the future, but it makes no difference on my impression of you." His lips were just out of reach of mine. "Let's not forget it though," he began to smile. "It was one of the best nights of my life."

And with that he kissed me.