Time going slowly

Chapter 17

Chapter 17- Stop toying with my heart

Nelly's POV.

'Yet another girl!' The article said. I threw the magazine across the room and cried out.

"So much for being someone special!" Walking down, I headed to the bathroom to get a shower. The water relaxed my body and forgot everything. I grabbed a razor and took the blade against my skin. Cutting a bit deep, the cut joined one of many that no-one knew about.

I sat down in the shower, allowing it to bleed down my arm. The tears joined the water which joined the blood. The blood turned water, getting a lighter shade as it went down my arm. It would leave a scar, like the other ones. Stepping out, I put a bandaid on the cut and grabbed a marker.

'He said I was special. But I know I'm not.' I wrote along with the other words that were also traced with markers. I turned around and put lyrics that held the tops of my legs.

"And just when I believe you changed for good. Well, you go and prove me wrong just like I knew you would." I sing as I inked them.

I changed into jeans, a band shirt and a beanie. Then headed downstairs, grabbing an apple for my breakfast. Locking the door, I headed down the street toward the studio. We had changed to an apartment as the rest of the cast was already gone. I walked into the studio with a smile on my face.

"Hey Nelly." People greeted me. I have them a small smile and a wave. Heading toward the office, Rose was already sitting down on the couches doing something with Murray (the scriptwriter).

"Nelly! You're finally here." Rose greeted.

"Rose, Murray." I greeted as I took a space next to him. Murray nodded and turned back to Rose.

"Rose, you've always done it. Why change it now?" He asked.

"Done what?" I asked, looking down at the table that was littered with pictures.

"Umm. A cast party. It's like the release party, but just for the cast and the crew." The director explained.

"I don't understand why not. We're still doing work, but I think that the crew needs a small party." I state as I gave a small smile.

"Exactly. We've worked our *ss off! And we're still working for the point." The scriptwriter agreed. Rose bit her lip and nodded.

"What's next?" I asked, changing the subject.

"Well, I've got to run down to one of the departments, so meet me in the blue room in 20." Rose said while getting up to walk out of the small meeting room. "By the way, Matt's at the door for you." I nodded and started to get up before Murray stopped me.

"Nelly, are you okay?" He asked quietly. I gave him a look and he held up one of the magazines.

"Amanda is having a field day about it." He started as I laughed. "He's a sick to do that to you."

"I'm fine. He's done worse, trust me."

"How? How can it be worse then this?" I started to grab my bag before looking at him.

"It's worse when he knows where you are, you know where he is and yet he doesn't come by. It's worse when he promises you, that he'll come back and then he doesn't. It's been 3 years Murray, he broke his promise. That's what's worse." I whispered as I headed out. Walking by the front door, I saw Matt sitting there. I waved to him and he got up.

"Hey, how are you?" He asked as he gave me a hug.

"Hanging in there." I whispered to him.

"It's not right Nelly, I don't know why you hold out hope."