Stars

Truth

The truth is we've all been there.

We've all been hurt from a simple scrape on the knee when we fell from our bike or when our daddy broke our heart when he left you for a green plant that makes you go to Cloud 9.

We've all been hurt.

Nobody can deny it.

Not even the rich kids can deny that they've been hurt before.

Even the popular kids have been hurt before.

You wanna know a secret?

I use to be popular.

Now your thinking, you? You use to be popular?

Why yes I did.

But, it's dark there. It's scary. You get lost because you gain so much power. It's like you have little minions following you around because they have no life of there own. Because without a top dog they don't know what to do with there lives.

Sneak peek into a popular world.

Running, running.
Passing the purple lockers that the art students painted over the summer. Passing the trophy case that holds the trophy your team won for volleyball.

Passing the students coming back from lunch. You hope there going to go back to class fast because you don't want anyone to know the truth.

You don't want them to know that everyday when you eat lunch that you hurl yourself over the toilet in the bathroom. Your body collapsing to the cold floor while you pray that none of the carbs went 'straight to your hips'. You hope that you haven't succeeded your daily limit of 700 calories.

But 2,000 calories is that daily limit.

So why 700?

Because that's how I keep my body. It's like a non-stop calculator going through my head.

Oh look an apple!

That equals about 16 sit-ups and 5 laps around the gym.

Then I wont be fat!

Hey mommy aren't you proud of me?

I'm finally not disgusting like you tell everyone I am, I'm finally someone you want.

I even have the boys chasing after me because I lost so much weight.

1

2

3

4

That was just this morning.

Toby, Timmy, John, and Luke all asked me out today.

But I said no because my legs are closed for the day.

I'm still a virgin I know it's a surprise.

But even though I'm sick, even though everyone thinks I have everything I know my morals.

Atleast I think I do.

There's something wrong with the world today.

When your skinny and you loose weight your sick.

If your fat and you loose weight your a success story.

You tell them "No I'm sick, I'm not alright!"
But the reply with a "No? You look great! How do you do it?"

Didn't you hear me?

I'm sick

I can't stop myself.

Oh wait.

I forgot.

In your eyes I'm perfect now.

So obviously there shouldn't be anything wrong with me.

I got the boobs

The ass

The curves

My stomachs even flat

Damn! Girl look at you go!

But no....

This doesn't make me happy.

A non-stop calculator in my head telling me what I need to do to loose weight when I just eat a bite of celery.

A fake smile plastered to my face when family comes over and congratulates me for the figure.

I lost the sparkle in my eyes.

Can't you see?

I'm literally dying inside.

My eyes, no there no longer bright with beauty.
There dull

There dead.

Kind of like I wish I was.

My skin is pale my cheeks are caving in. My bodies so weak I can't even stand!

But does anyone notice?

Oh no.

But here's the thing.

They all try to help when it's to late.

They all get to help when they see your body laying on the bloody bathroom floor. When they see the pill bottles spilling from your hands. When they see the fresh scarlet blood spewing from your wrists rolling down to the floor.

Yea they all try to help then

Someone call 911!

My baby, she's dead.

But why do you even care?

You didn't before.

But I'm dead now, so I guess you have a right to be scared. But you didn't listen to me all those years when I told you I was sick.

Mentally sick.

The thoughts.

The words

Your fat, ugly, nothing, worthless, a nobody, no one will ever want you!

Why don't you go die already!

Oh yea.

I remember all those words.

But it's to late to apologise for your words because look at where we are.

The hospital bed. Doctors rushing in ordering people around. If they save me now don't they know I'll try again?

I really do need help.

But who's there to help me.