Thou Shall Not Sin

TSNS 1

6 months earlier.

Kylie and Johnny in MM

"And the lord said, thou shall love thy neighbor! That meaning, no matter what is going on in your life, no matter what is being done to you by evil people, you got to love everybody!" My husband, Pastor Johnny Lockville preached.

I wish he lived by what he preached.

"Preach Honey!" I yelled out in support.

He didn't even look at me. Just kept going with his rant of lies. Saying how "holy" he was. That's all bullshit. If only these people knew that behind closed doors, he acted more like a bum off the damn streets than his wife.

We been together fifteen years and married for ten. At first, he was perfect and I was holding him down, but when he became famous around the city, he changed. He became mean and cold towards me. I love him with all my heart and I don't wanna lose him, but he just doesn't seem to care at all.

I gave up my dreams for him. I'm 35 and before I married him, I was a plus size model. I was trying to make it big in the modeling world, but I gave all that up because Johnny said it wouldn't look right with me modeling lingerie and swim suits while he's trying to preach the word of god. Some bullshit about my body being a temple...but he has cheated on me three times that I know of...that doesn't sound like very much of a fucking temple to me.

I remember the last time I caught him cheating. His side chick had called me and told me what was up. She even sent me pictures of them together. I didn't want to believe it, but pictures spoke a thousand words.

Flashback

"Where have you been?" I asked Johnny when he walked in.  I was pissed.

"Girl go sit yo fat ass down and leave me alone." He said rolling his eyes as he walked into the kitchen.

"How could you talk to me like that after all we've been through. I love you and you act like I've done something to you." I said getting mad.

"Bitch fuck you. Now what the fuck do you want? It better be important." He said glaring at me.

"I got screen shots and pictures from your side chick, Tamika." I said placing my hands on my hips.

"What the hell is you talking about? Wait...what she say?" He asked looking at me.

"She told me all about how y'all been fucking for two months. Two months!?"

"It's just a fling. She meant nothing. I was just having a little fun." He said smirking.

My jaw dropped. How could he make it seem like it wasn't even serious? He hurt me and he doesn't even seem to care. Maybe because he's hurt me times before and I didn't leave.

"So that's why you couldn't do nothing with me for our anniversaries? That's why you been coming home late. That's why you haven't been showing up to preach at yo own church!?" I yelled at him.

"You know what? It's because you so fat and nasty looking. You was just thick at first but now you what, 290? Fat ass bitch. Nobody want you but me so gon head and quit that mad shit and go sit down. You ain't going nowhere." He said smirking.

Tears streamed down my face. "I can't believe you! I've done everything for you! You know what, I can't with this." I said before walking out the kitchen.

I went to the bedroom and headed for the closet. I need time apart from him. I don't know how long I'll be gone, but I gotta go. After a good ten minutes I had whatever I felt like I needed packed up.

I was heading for the bedroom door to leave when Johnny walked in and looked shocked that I was leaving.

"Where you goin?" He asked.

"Why do you care?" I asked with venom in my voice.

Before I knew it, Johnny had me against the wall in a choke hold. His hold was strong and he looked like he was out to kill. Feat took over me. He's never put his hands on me before.

"Please....stop. Johnny please." I couldn't breathe and his tight grip on my neck was sure to leave a bruise.

"Fuckin bitch." Johnny said letting me go and walking out the room.

"Jesus please help me." I said as I tried to catch my breath.

After a few minutes, I heard the front door slam. I took that as my que to haul ass. I got out of there quickly and made it to my mom's house as soon as I could.

That night, my view of him changed forever and as he preached his lies, I thought about how I knew better than any of the people in here that he was a phony.

"Something wrong with your neck?" One of the church ladies asked.

"Oh no. Just a habit." I lied secretly asking god for forgiveness in my head. I didn't even know I was touching my neck.

Jesus help me. I thought to myself. I needed to get out of there. I quickly walked to the back where his office was and sat down. I needed some piece of mind, little did I know, I wasn't going to have it for long.

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