Digging Holes - A Divergent Fanfiction

Then the Heart Monitor Stops Beeping

I can only see darkness. I am freezing cold.

            Several things occur to me

I could be dead. If I am dead, I wish I’d known how dull it would be.

I could be in a drugged state. Thus, I am alive but not truly conscious. Alive is good. I don’t understand how I can be thinking though, if I am asleep in some way.

The last eventuality is that I am alive and have resisted the serum. While I very much want this to be the case, I can’t believe that it could be that simple. It does seem the most likely scenario, though.

I am about to try moving my fingers to see if I am alive, when I realise that I should not move. If I move, it will be a giveaway. At first I think it will be difficult to stay still without being tense, but it isn’t. In fact, I cannot move.

I feel a hand on my wrist.

“The pulse has stopped.”

This is it, I think. I’m dead. Properly dead.

What terrifies me most is that I can still think and feel. I didn’t think being dead meant your mind could function but your body couldn’t. I thought it would be like being asleep. Maybe you could have a dream at most, but not think consciously.

“Send the body to the crematorium,” I recognise Jack Kang’s voice.

No!

            Fear bubbles up inside of me as I feel myself be unstrapped from the chair.

I hear door burst open. Loud sobbing fills the room.

“He doesn’t deserve this,” I recognise Rose through her sobs.

“It is already done,” says Jack Kang softly, kindly. Like he has never spoken to me.

“He had one last request,” Rose says.

“How would you know that?” asks an unfamiliar voice who I belongs to a doctor.

“I read… something Emra wrote when he was in school,” Rose quickly improvises. “He wrote that if he died before his mother, he wanted to be buried in his yard next to his father. Please let me take him.”

I wonder if they will believe her. My father is not buried there.

There is a short moment of silence.

“I don’t see why he shouldn’t be,” Jack Kang says.

This makes me feel relieved. I still cannot tell if I am dead or not. I do not think I am; I can feel too much. Thinking is one thing, but feeling and hearing? I don’t think that’s what being dead is like.

“How are you planning on carrying him?” asks a second unfamiliar voice.

Rose hesitates. It hadn’t occurred to me that she was going to have to remove me herself or I would have thought of a solution, or asked her to think of one.

“I’ll tell Inspector Traugott to drive him to his house. He has a car. You may go with him if you wish, although I do not understand why you would want to travel with a dead classmate,” I hear the soft windy sound of someone’s head nodding at Jack Kang’s words.

“We were very close friends,” Rose says.

I hear a beeping noise as someone dials a number on a phone.

“Inspector? No, but it is not a normal job for you this time. More of an errand.” A pause. “Yes, I do understand that this is a waste of time, but you are the only one available at the moment who can drive, and Mr Kang requested it. Yes.” There is another pause as Traugott says something I cannot hear. “Please come by the execution room in a minute of two.” There is a click, which I assume is the caller hanging up.

“You can sit down while we’re waiting…” I hear a voice addressing Rose.

            “I’ll stand, thanks,” she says, boldly. I wonder if she is still crying or if she has tear stains down her face. She probably does.

There is an awkward silence for a few minutes while they, and I, wait for Traugott to arrive. I cannot see anyone, but judging by the sound (of which there is none), I assume they are picking at their fingernails, and looking at their watches, and generally being bored.

            There is a knock on the door.

Jack Kang says, “I will assign a guard to accompany you so it is not suspicious to be travelling with a deceased body.”

I hear and feel shuffling as I am lifted up from the chair.

“Thank you for this, it means a lot,” chokes Rose.

“You are very welcome. Goodbye,” Jack Kang replies. “Stay truthful.”

It is only now that I realise why they believe Rose. Almost everyone here is Candor; you would barely even think to doubt anybody.

            Yet Traugott has been lying to them for years. What a stroke of luck he is the one taking me home; he is the one that saved me, if indeed I am still alive.

The most truthful place there is is littered with lies.

Sorry this took so long. This chapter was weird to write, I found it boring and I rushed it a bit. It was hard to explain what's going n since he can't see.

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