PS: I Love You! (A Cody Simpson Love Story)

Chapter 25: An Honest Conversation

I walk up our driveway quietly, trying to delay my reaction for when my dad and Cody notice me. 

I hadn't noticed before now that I was shaking. 

Why am I having this reaction? 

My dad spots me first. "Ashley!" He shouts, making Cody turn my way. 

My heart skips a beat when his eyes meet mine. Cody looks as good as he has always done. He is wearing a white hoodie and some light-washed jeans. He must be freezing because January in the UK weather made for layering. 

"Hey" I say awkwardly. 

"Look who's here!" My dad says, gesturing to Cody as if I hadn't seen him already. My eyes never left him. 

"I can see that" I say through gritted teeth.

My dad has always been a fan of Cody. Probably because I never told him about why we broke up. Probably because all my dad heard was all the nice and good dates and moments we had together. And when mom finally told him we had broken up, he was scared to push the subject so he never really did. 

Now he must assume we have agreed that Cody was coming here? 

"I'll leave you to it" he says and walks back inside, closing the door. 

I walk over to the seating area we have on the porch. We have put up heating in the ceiling so it'll make it possible to sit outside during the winter. 

I sit down, and Cody sits down opposite me. 

"Why are you here?" I ask, looking him dead in the eyes. 

"I thought you wanted me to" He says quietly. 

When have I ever given him this impression?

"How? We haven't spoken in months. I didn't reply to your letter" I begin, a little surprised about how worked up it's making me. 

"Oh, so you actually don't remember?" 

Chills travel down my spine as he says this. What do I not remember? 

"What do you mean?" I ask, feeling nauseas. 

"You called me yesterday, Ashley. You told me you love me"

Oh.My.God. 

Oh.My.God.

What is wrong with me? 

More importantly, I am never touching alcohol again!

"Say something" Cody says. He must notice how I am freaking out on the inside. 

"What do you want me to say?" 

"Anything. Why did you say it if you don't mean it?" 

I meet his eyes once again, unsure of what to do. I do love him. I have loved him regardless of how much I have spent the last months trying not to. 

"I was drunk! I don't remember anything about last night" I whisper, silently praying that no one inside the house was listening to our conversation. 

The look on Cody's face is mixed with hurt and surprise. 

I can't help but feel a little guilty but what does he want me to do? Lie?

I sigh. 

"Even if I had remembered yesterday, who just travels across the world for something someone says?" I say, raising my voice slightly. "It's not fair to me. You are putting me in a shitty situation". 

"How? By taking a chance when I see one?"

I scowl at him. "That was hardly a chance. You must have realised I was drunk".