Friend, Please (A Tyler Joseph Fanfiction)

Chapter Five

Trigger Warning!! 

It's been a few weeks since Winter break has ended, but I'm just now getting back into a half decent routine. I've been struggling pretty badly in school considering I don't make time for homework and I guess you can say that I've missed a few too many days of school. Today just happened to be one of the days that I did go to school.

I'm currently sitting in my last period class which happens to be English. Unfortunately, Mal and I don't have this period together so I'm currently sitting next to one of my least favorite people. She's alright until she starts making small talk with me. I begin to think that maybe I could get through this period without having to hear her aggravating voice, but then I hear the same squeaky voice that haunts my dreams. Not literally because she doesn't have that much of an affect on me, but you get my point. I hate her voice.

"I love your hair today. You look so cute," Ashley says. As you can see, she compliments me and although this may seem like a nice thing, I know that she does not mean for it to be taken as one.

"Thanks," I answer simply in hopes of her not starting a conversation. However, she chooses to push me further than I'm willing to go.

"So have you read this book before?" she asks referring to the book that my teacher just handed out to the class. I answer with a nod. The book we were given is To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee and it just so happens that it's one of my favorite books. "So do you like this book?" she asks while fixing her already tamed hair. Again, I nod. I only wish that Ashley knew when to stop trying and take the hint that this conversation was very much unwanted. "What do you like about it?"

"I don't know Ashley. I'm really not in the mood to socialize so if you don't mind, I'm gonna go back to ignoring everything," I say truthfully.

"You're literally never in the mood to socialize." I choose to ignore her. She knows nothing about me so she doesn't even have the right to comment about my moods. She knows nothing about how I feel and what I don't want to feel.

While I was zoning out, I hear my name be called.

"Shay, what do you think about this?" I hear my teacher, Ms. Smith say. I know that she only called on me because she saw that I wasn't paying attention and I hate when teachers do that. After deciding that I can't deal with the attitude that my teacher decided to give me, I get out of my seat and begin to walk out of class. I hear my name being called, but I don't stop.

I'm not one of those problematic students who always get in trouble for being stupid and reckless; I'm just dealing with a lot of feelings today and I really don't want to be around people. I knew that this day was gonna be bad from the minute I woke up, but I had a lot to do in school and it would've been stupid to miss it, but coming to school today made me feel worse than I originally did.

Being around people in school makes it so much harder for me to be okay. I see the way that other students interact with each other and the way that they walk through the halls with so much confidence. Looking at things like that just make it more clear to me how different I am from them. I don't know how to be confident and how to be out there like they do. I don't know how to share my thoughts as easily as they do and if I do share my thoughts, I end up having an anxiety attack or nearly having one.

I text Mal to let her know that I'm leaving early and that I'll leave my car key in her locker so she could drive herself home. I don't really mind walking anyway. I make my way to her locker and put in the combination. After putting my key on one of her books, I hear my name be called over the loudspeaker.

"Shay King, please make your way to Principle Miller's office."

I ignore it and leave school.