One Shots : Chanbaek

Pick Up Lines

Chanyeol and his friends were playing truth or dare out on the road in the middle of the city.

"Okay, Chanyeol" Chen said "I dare you to say a pick up line to that brunette over there"

Chanyeol smirked "Sure"

He casually walked over to the brunette boy and tapped his shoulder, interrupting his conversation he was having with an owl eyed boy.

Chanyeol cleared his throat "My dick just died. Would you mind if I buried it in your ass?"

The boy's eyes widened and Chanyeol laughed.

"I have another one" Chanyeol stated "You have that bomb ass and I want to diffuse it"

Eventually, the brunette started laughing "What type of pick up lines are those?"

"Smooth, right?" Chanyeol said in a cocky tone and popped his collar "Wanna hear another one?"

The boy nodded and waited for what Chanyeol would say.

As soon as Chanyeol's lips quirked up to say something, the brunette laughed. Chanyeol gave him a confused look, but he told him to go on.

"I hope you like dragons, because I'll be dragon my balls on your face tonight"

The boy laughed and his friend joined. He started crying because of laughing so much.

"What's your name?" Chanyeol asked

"I'm Baekhyun and he's Kyungsoo" the boy answered

"Okay Baek, I'd like to use your thighs as earmuffs" Chanyeol said and earned another fit of laughter from the boy

To him, the sound of Baekhyun laughing was music to his yoda like ears.

"Hey Chen, Sehun and Kris" Chanyeol called to his friends "Come over and join us"

His friends joined and sat on the bench beside them.

"I wanna hear more pick up lines" Baekhyun said cutely

Chanyeol smiled and continued "Are you hungry? Cause omelette you suck this dick."

They erupted in laughter, while Chanyeol had a smug look on his face, pleased that his lines made them laugh.

"You have a beautiful voice. I bet it would sound even better muffled by my dick"

Everyone went quiet, then Chen ruined it by laughing loudly.

"Why do I feel all these things that you're saying is what you want to do to me?" Baekhyun said

Chanyeol smirked "Yeah. You look like skittles and I'd like to taste your rainbow"

Baekhyun smiled "How about you be my story and I'll be your climax"

Chanyeol was surprised Baekhyun knew pick up lines.

"Hey" Chanyeol said "I wanna hear Baek say another pick up line"

Baekhyun smirked "If I was a watermelon, would you spit or swallow my seeds?"

At that, everyone cracked up and gave Baekhyun a thumbs up. He was impressed with himself for saying that line.

"I have one" Chen raised his hand "I'm a burglar and I'm gonna smash your backdoor in."

Everyone laughed yet again and received weird gazes from the people passing. They were laughing extremely loud, especially Chen and Chanyeol.

Kris joined in on saying a line "Do you like tapes and CD's? Cause I'm gonna tape this dick to your forehead so you CD's nuts."

"My stomach hurts" Baekhyun said and clutched it "You guys are too funny"

"I'd like to say one" sehun volunteered "I wanna floss with your pubic hair."

Nobody laughed.

"What the-"

"Lame"

"C'mon guys" Sehun whined "That was good"

"No"

Sehun pouted "Do you like pudding? Cause I'll be pudding this dick in your ass"

"Now that was funny!" Kris stated and started dying of laughter

Kyungsoo ten nudged Baekhyun "We have to go"

"Oh, right" Baekhyun said a little sad that he has to leave "I have to go now"

"Wait," Chanyeol said, "Can I have your number?"

Baekhyun gratefully gave him his number.

"Bye~" Chanyeol said in a sing song tone and waved at them "and remember, I'll be hiding my dick inside you and blowing you like a flute" (lol thanks @sleepyoon for the flute part)

"You're a funny guy, Yeol" Baekhyun shouted "You should join the circus so you can learn to juggle my balls"

And that's how Chanyeol met the love of his life. LOL!!

***

Here's another pick up line "Hey baby, as long as I have a face, you'll have a place to sit"

Lmao, my lifeu sucks~~