I Am Me (BTS's Taehyung) [Complete]

I Am Me

| Chapter 12 | I Can't |

Taehyung had been thinking throughout the whole date with Hana. After getting off the roof of the old house, they headed off to a carnival where Taehyung won two stuffed bears for Hana. She laughed when Taehyung won a very fluffy bear and a very stylish bear for her. She decided to give Tae the stylish bear for it was hard to carry two at a time.

They went to many booths and laughed as they enjoyed one another's company. Even if Taehyung was having fun, his memories continued to get in the way. It hurt Taehyung so much and he wanted to kill those memories but he couldn't. How could he when those memories went on telling him You can't?

The day was almost over when they started to head back to Hana's house, feeling a bit unnerve at the situation at hand. Taehyung was quiet with his thought as for Hana, she was telling Tae about how she will be missing everything here and especially BTS. He smiled at her sadness. He was happy that she will miss them and he was hoping that they can meet up soon.

When Hana got the call for the acceptance for the four schools, Hana was clueless into what University she'd like to enter. She thought it over so many times so she'll be taking a tour for two weeks to find the perfect school for her. How stressing it was for her but it will only be for two weeks, then she'll come back and stay home for three months then off to school. Since her graduation was a while back, Max and her decided to make a small celebration and everyone attended (more like BTS, Jason, the Kim Family, and some couple of friends from both Max and Hana's side).

As Taehyung continued to doze off with his thoughts, they finally ended up arriving at Hana's house. Tae took her up to her apartment, looking over at Hana every once in a while as she nervously looked down at her feet as she walked absent-mindedly.

It was hurting Taehyung even more as they continued to get closer to her apartment door. Every step he took was an echo inside his head. Why was he so nervous? He didn't know why himself. The one thing he knows is the memories are overlapping with the memories of Hana and he needed to get rid of them.

They finally got to the door of the apartment. Hana turned to look at Taehyung who was nervously looking away from her, rubbing his neck like if he has been lifting heavy objects all day. In front of her, she saw an amazing dude, yet she couldn't figure whether to tell him her feelings. They have been going on dates for a while and it's about time she said something about all this. But... She'll eventually leave, so what's she suppose to do then? She'll be gone for two weeks then come back and spend her time with him, so there's nothing to worry about.

She mentally sighed, putting on a smile for Taehyung.

"Tae," She called to him. Taehyung looked up to stare up at Hana, his eyes showing a bit of fear as she spoke.

"Listen," She began. "It's... It's been a few weeks and we've been going on dates for so long. I really need to tell you how I feel." As soon as he wanted to cut her off, he couldn't. He's not getting off on the wrong foot with her and especially not now that she's leaving in one week.

She looked troubled but finally was able to approach Taehyung and gently hold his hand in hers. Taehyung watched their hands intertwined with each other, feeling himself heat up from the many thoughts that ran through his head.

"I like you a lot, Kim Taehyung..."

= V = V =

Taehyung got home to an angry mother and disappointed father at the entrance of his home. He walked in without even looking at them, passing them by with running tears he tried hiding from the two parents.

"Taehyung! I'm talking to you!" Baekhyun shouted to her son, making him stop at the staircase with his back turned to them.

"I've been calling you and didn't answer my calls Tae," She began to lecture. "Your dad told you not leave, and there you go being rebellious again. I wanted us to have dinner together again like the old times."

The old times... Taehyung didn't look at his parents and didn't respond to them as they continued to lecture him.

"Taehyung! Don't be ignoring us! Look at us when we are talking to you!" Daehyun finally snapped at his son, startling his wife but not fazing his son. Taehyung looked over at his parents, tears still continued to run down his face but with a bit of scratch marks at his cheeks. The marks represented his stupidity, his pain, his anger towards all this. Some of the marks were deep and lined up perfectly with the way his fingers laid, showing that his past was killing him deep inside and stabbing his life away.

His mother was startled by the marks and the tears. The marks were clearly recent, it was noticeable with the blood still trickling down. She quickly went to him and pulled him down from the stairs and looked at her son's face.

"Tae, what happened?!" She asked frantically. Taehyung looked over at her and stared blankly. His dad approached his son and looked him over with a sadden face.

Did he do it or did Hana? He asked himself. Daehyun pushed the hair out of his son's eyes and stared at more marks on his forehead. Still recent.

"Taehyung," His father sighed with worry. Taehyung looked at them both, not willing to talk or nod or anything. He was broken and they didn't know why.

"Sweetie," His mother soothed. Taehyung couldn't contain his tears and pain anymore, then that's when he began crying. His mother hugged him, crying along with him as his father hugged him as well. Taehyung's cries were painful, they were heard even from the outside. He cried so hard along with his mothers' silent cries and his fathers' clenching teeth, that it felt so dead. So sad that Taehyung couldn't support all the pain anymore that right then and there, he began to lose himself in his own pit of darkness.

No one must know what he went through.

= V = V =

The next day felt dark, with invisible clouds hanging from the Kim Family and BTS. Taehyung was laying in his bed with emotional trauma and unknown to the family and friends other than Yoogni, depression and a eating disorder. Yoogni was able to see the pain of each and everyone of the people in room, and at that very moment he wanted to say something. He wasn't sure if it would be the right move with the following situation happening. He let it sit in his head for a while until he sighed in complete frustration as he got up from a chair that was laying about in Taehyung's room.

"I'm going to use the bathroom," Yoogni interrupted the thinking of the people in Taehyung's room, getting the attention of everyone.

"Sure thing son," Daehyun responded, and soon enough, Yoogni exited the room, closing the door behind him and entering an empty hallway with no life running through it. He looked over to his right, then his left to find that he didn't need to do anything. He didn't really need to use the bathroom, just needed to leave the room to relieve himself from the depression inside that room.

He sulked against the wall and sat against it with his hand running through his hair. At that point, what was he supposed to do? The only way to help was to tell BTS and his parents, but he was afraid. Unknowingly, afraid.

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