Ara's POV
I don't know how to react or what to respond.
Pagtingin ko sa shirt ko ay may mga marka nga ng lipstick. Pag angat ko ng tingin kay Mika ay wala akong makitang emosyon sa kanya.
"Ahmm, ano eh.." Punyeta, speak up Ara! She knows the rules, she will understand!
This is so unusual. Me talking to myself reminding myself how I should be in this situation. This is so not me. I should just shrug it off.
But I just can't.
Then I saw her smile a little and say...
"I shouldn't have asked. Sorry pakialamera si julalay mo eh!" then she just continued to fix the equipment we need for the photoshoot.
"Ah Ye, kasi kanina merong..." I was persistent to explain what happened to her but she cut me off.
"Anubah, Ara! Alam ko na naman yan. And no need to explain. Rules remember? Ikaw masyado ka namang bago ng bago eh!" Natatawa pa nyang sabi.
I fell silent for a while. Bakit apektado ako sa sinabi nya. Am I expecting na magagalit sya dahil I had another 'bout' with another girl? Am I expecting na magseselos sya? And now that it seems everything is okay with her, why do I feel disappointed?
"Pssttt magaling ba bago nating cover girl?"
That question surprised me.
I looked up to her and saw her raising her eyebrows as if she's dreading to hear my answer. No signs of anger or jealousy on her face. It's as if I am speaking with Kim everytime she asks me to rate every girl I bedded. Parang tropa na nang aasar.
"Ye, I'll just change first. Hintayin mo na lang ako sa labas."
This whole conversation is very uncomfortable for me. Why do I have this feeling that it shouldn't be this way when I'm talking to Mika.
Why do I suddenly feel that she doesn't deserve this setup? This mess. These rules.
And again, nagulat ako ng bigla uli syang nagsalita.
"Grabe sya, ayaw man lang magkwento! Kumukuha lang naman ng tips para magawa ko din eh!" And she continued to laugh.
I was just looking at her the whole time. I was assessing her.
Then she stopped laughing and said..
"Nga pala, I have another surprise for you tonight." She said then laughed flirtatiously while walking out of my office.
What the fuck? Why does it look and sound natural for her to be that flirtatious?
What's happening to my Mika?
My Mika.
Ahhh, yes! My Mika! She's mine remember?
We're in this game we both agreed to play. So she's still mine while the game is still on.
Ganyan lang, Ara. It's just a game!
A GAME.
But should I acknowledge this fuckin' feeling that it's starting to be something else. That it's becoming more than a game.
