How Can You Ease The Pain

Discovery

The evening was descending upon them and the sun slowly going down.

The kiss lingered in the air and the two men were content to just be in the moment, staring at each other, as if the other would soon disappear. Neither man wanted that to happen. They were holding each other tightly, Zitao enjoying the embrace of the reclusive author.

He felt as if the outside world were no longer his concern, being here with Kris was what he aspired too and now he'd gained entry. He'd acquired something, that in that very moment, he hadn't realized he wanted.

Kris had confided something most trustworthy, he spoke freely with Zitao.

How Zitao hurt, deeply, upon hearing the anguished past of Kris. He couldn't even fathom such a story occurring in his rather mundane life. Zitao could somewhat understand now why Kris chose to isolate himself. After such a traumatizing event, he could stand to reason the man's fear. It made perfect sense. In a short period of time, what Zitao had come to understand was that he was falling into something serious.

Something deep.

And he was falling hard.

He wasn't really expecting something with the author, only thinking they'd meet and fuck.

That's the level of simplicity that Zitao was initially after. Kris was drop dead gorgeous, in Zitao's mind, after seeing his earlier photos online. Zitao had fallen in lust. But now, after meeting the man and hearing his painful history, he was feeling something more.

He'd never felt like this before and he knew it all had to do with Kris.

He can smell Kris, but it's not a smell that he doesn't like. A smell that he is growing to love, perhaps a little too much. Zitao thinks it's perhaps Kris's natural scent, considering they've been on his couch for quite some time. He hadn't realized that the time was going and going.

But.

He had time.

Time just wasn't an issue anymore.

Zitao's eyelids fluttered, realizing how close he was pressed to Kris's chest. He was fighting the urge to simply straddle the man to take in more of him. He didn't want to scare Kris though, and he ever so lightly, quite shamelessly, runs his thumb across the curve of Kris's cheek. He allows himself to trace the author's powerful jawline with his eyes, just Kris's overall facial expressions. His eyes land on his lips. They're plump and full and sumptuous and oh man, does Zitao just want to lean up and tear them apart. They've had a little kiss but nothing like what Zitao wants to do to the man now. He wants to ravage him. He can only surmise those lips taste like heaven. He's staring so hard that he can feel an intensity, thinking it's coming from him, that he looks into the man's eyes, only to see the author's eye burning a highway to his soul. Zitao loudly exhales, swallowing the lump that's immediately in his throat. He's ashamed of himself, really. He knows he's crossed many a boundary the author has set for himself, realizing he should extricate himself from the bear hold he's currently captured in. Reality reacquaints him with his situation and he hastily removes his fingers from Kris's face. "Uhm, yeah, sorry about that," he says in almost a whisper and Kris can't help but put focus on the beautiful man's lips. They're really close. It's exhausting Kris, as he's fighting the attraction to this person who he doesn't feel he should allow in. The attraction is so strong that Kris can't function, he's a thousand times sure that he's blushing, he knows he is. Zitao grants him a reprieve by keeping that information top secret. Taking a few quiet breaths, he pulls away and closes his eyes.

♦⇔⇔♦ ♦⇔⇔♦ ♦⇔⇔♦

The skyline was blazing right in Kris's bedroom, his large picture windows capturing the wonderful night sky. Zitao was a light sleeper, but typically had many a restless night. He wasn't fulfilled, not in any sense of the word. This wasn't his apartment, nor was it his bed (when did they end up here?) but Zitao had never slept so well. He was still feeling out of sorts and was tempted to sneak out, leaving Kris asleep. He realized that Kris's penthouse was rather large and it troubled him that the man spent all his time in the confines of this self-imposed solitude. How lonely could the man be? He wanted to change all of that. He was being pulled towards something but not sure what.

He liked Kris.

He did.

He was realizing that it was something much more than what he typically wanted in a few hours of sexual release. He really wanted to get to know Kris. If the man would allow it, that was the much needed to know question. There was something brewing. Zitao knew it. They shared something yesterday and it was more than just a random dick. Zitao looked at the man across from him and his heart swelled, the man looked peaceful. He could only imagine how stressful it was for him, day in and day out, having to relive the chain of events that had forever traumatized him. He was punishing himself, over and over again and Zitao thought that it was wrong. It wasn't his fault that his best friend went to the far side of bat shit crazy! In his moments of retrospection, Kris's eyes slowly opened.

"Uh, Hi." Kris was hesitant to open his eyes, knowing that Zitao was looking at him intently. He could feel the burning gaze. He was undecided on what to do about it. This was the first time that he slept so comfortably, so peacefully in his own home. He attributed that notion to the one gorgeous man lying next to him. He wonders when they made it to his bedroom, let alone his bed considering they'd been talking on his couch. He had to admit that this was truly refreshing and he could get used to this. He'd never had a real relationship before and he was feeling something for Zitao. He couldn't quite put his finger on it, but it was something he wanted to explore.

"Hi. Do you know how we ended up in here?" Zitao wanted to see if the author would admit anything or perhaps it was a mutual decision they made while they were both intoxicated with each other. He most certainly wanted to explore those options.

"I really don't know. We didn't have any liquor or anything like that, so maybe we were just both tired. I don't know." Kris really had no answer to that question, but what he wanted to say, he couldn't bring his mouth to let loose. Again, the author was at a loss of words. What he wanted though, now more than anything, was for the delivery man to stay. "Uh, Zitao, uhm, what I want, uh, oh boy, can you, uh, can you stay with me for a little bit longer?"